My in-laws are driving me crazy. Please help me!?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Leish
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Leish

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My now-husband just recently eloped. We just couldn't take the pressure from his parents. My parents said I could have a modest wedding, or a down payment for a house. I chose the down payment. I am a pretty down to earth and realistic young woman, and in this day and age, just can not reason spending thousands of dollars for a few hours. His parents were furious, said we had no values and that they would pay for everything and throw us a big wedding. I knew it would never be the kind of wedding I would have liked and if my in-laws were paying, they would be just as controlling over everything. I couldn't deal with that. We said no, that is not for us. We want something very small and private, and I did not want to humiliate my parents full well knowing the could not afford the kind of wedding my in-laws wanted! So we did our own thing. We got married on the beach, at sunset and it was just us, and it was perfect. We told his parents about 3 weeks after we got married, and they are furious. They screamed and said we are selfish, immoral and disrespectful. To top it all off, I am 8 weeks pregnant, unplanned, but certainly not unwanted. We are so happy to be having a baby, and we are so excited! They could care less about the baby, and becoming grandparents. I fear that out relationship is totally ruined with them. They have made me feel so guilty, and I do not even know what to say to them at this point. My parents have been so amazing and supportive, and truely want my husband and I to be happy. What can I say to salvage some sort of relationship with my in-laws?
 
great idea! Do what makes you happy! ....at the end of the day, you aren't going anywhere and they aren't either...just suck it up and keep it moving. It is not like you live with them or they are paying your bills. I know it sucks that they aren't showing interest in your child, but be blessed that your parents are supportive! Good luck with the baby....and I completely understand...I was in a similiar situation. I just get along with them b/c it is the only thing to do,,,its easier that way.
 
I agree with Peperg, why did you wait 3 weeks? That is disrespectful. Anyway, they will have to get over it. What's said is said and what's done is done.

Sounds like, if you want in with them, feed them some home truths about the situation. It's you and your husband's life not there life, your wedding is your wedding not there's.

Living vicariously is just sad and pathetic. You obviously want them still in your lives, so let them know that too.

Basically, put all cards on the table, and take it how it comes. I would apologies for why it took so long to tell them. If it were my kid who did that I would be hurt and would find it a little difficult to understand.
 
When the baby is born they will totally forget about everything. Time heals all wounds.
 
When the baby is born they will totally forget about everything. Time heals all wounds.
 
When the baby is born they will totally forget about everything. Time heals all wounds.
 
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