Maybe he put 2 and 2 together, and figured out that sex = more kids, maybe someone had to explain it to him. Maybe you are boring in bed, Maybe he has the economy and his job on his mind. Maybe he'd like to wake up to a little head job, or the babysitter is taking care of him. The point is, it could be one of ten million reasons. There is no reason to think it is you, or your fault. Women do that all the time, and it really pisses me off sometimes. The problem lies with your husband. He needs to tell you what he wants in the bed room, and you need to try and deliver it. If what he wants makes you uncomfortable, (anal, rape fantasy, slapping, whatever) get him a blow up doll to play with. Don't degrade yourself, don't blame yourself, don't give up. It's not your fault. He could be under allot of stress...
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my husband in not interested in being physically intimate with me? i do not know why?
- Thread starter cppdummy
- Start date
we were very good sexually with each other at the begining of our marriage, but as i got pregnant he started losing interest bit by bit, until now 1.5 years after delivery we only get intimate evey 1 or 2 months and sometimes even more, i donot think that he has ED since i see him erected while being asleep. i think its me, i am tired of talking about it with him as he seems not interested, is my marriage over?
You have to come to understand that men and women are wired quite differently (Men are from Mars - Women are from Venus by J. Gray).
Women generally find their greatest intimacy from COMMUNICATION. This is why women's porn is romance novels. (no pictures - WORDS!)
Men generally find their greatest sense of intimacy from and through sex. Sounds juvenile to be sure, but this is how most men are geared up. Since he doesn't want sex from you, you can be sure that he is getting it somewhere else. This does not have to be a sexual affair. On-line "dating" and porn are the most prevalent forms of fantasy escapism to find the intimacy he craves and does not get from you.
If you are a free source of what he craves, why would he move away from you? This is where it can get tricky.
1 - Your body changed and he does not like it. This is why most men turn to porn. He can "have" any woman (or thing) he desires. He will NEVER be rejected. In porn, he is always the KING!
2 - Your attention has shifted away from him to the baby. He can't take that rejection because he is emotionally as immature as the baby. He sees you as the real problem and resents you for that. Hence, he does not want to be "with" you.
3 - With a new baby, you have found the real identity that most women CRAVE - to have and be a FAMILY! It is with the baby that you have found a new purpose and he sees himself as not being a part of that. He has moved away from you as you have found a new and greater purpose.
4 - For a myriad of reasons - he just found porn easier to relate too than you.
5 - As a woman, you are wired into intimate communication which he feels totally overwhelmed to be a part of. You want to talk - he sees it all as one big argument. (Men are like Waffles - Women are like Spaghetti by Farrel) Rather than come to understand who you really are - it's just easier to walk away and not deal with all the hassles of being IN an intimate relationship where you (as woman) are really in control. As you demand greater and greater amounts of communication (which he cannot do), you get frustrated and he feels emasculated. He sees you as the cause of all his grief.
Why would he want to make love to someone that appears to be the cause of all his troubles? This is why guys turn to porn and affairs. There is no BAGGAGE in an affair or porn. There is no need to do any work in an affair or porn. It is all superficial, shallow and hollow.......which is how most guys operate anyway.
You want more and he doesn't have a clue.
Women generally find their greatest intimacy from COMMUNICATION. This is why women's porn is romance novels. (no pictures - WORDS!)
Men generally find their greatest sense of intimacy from and through sex. Sounds juvenile to be sure, but this is how most men are geared up. Since he doesn't want sex from you, you can be sure that he is getting it somewhere else. This does not have to be a sexual affair. On-line "dating" and porn are the most prevalent forms of fantasy escapism to find the intimacy he craves and does not get from you.
If you are a free source of what he craves, why would he move away from you? This is where it can get tricky.
1 - Your body changed and he does not like it. This is why most men turn to porn. He can "have" any woman (or thing) he desires. He will NEVER be rejected. In porn, he is always the KING!
2 - Your attention has shifted away from him to the baby. He can't take that rejection because he is emotionally as immature as the baby. He sees you as the real problem and resents you for that. Hence, he does not want to be "with" you.
3 - With a new baby, you have found the real identity that most women CRAVE - to have and be a FAMILY! It is with the baby that you have found a new purpose and he sees himself as not being a part of that. He has moved away from you as you have found a new and greater purpose.
4 - For a myriad of reasons - he just found porn easier to relate too than you.
5 - As a woman, you are wired into intimate communication which he feels totally overwhelmed to be a part of. You want to talk - he sees it all as one big argument. (Men are like Waffles - Women are like Spaghetti by Farrel) Rather than come to understand who you really are - it's just easier to walk away and not deal with all the hassles of being IN an intimate relationship where you (as woman) are really in control. As you demand greater and greater amounts of communication (which he cannot do), you get frustrated and he feels emasculated. He sees you as the cause of all his grief.
Why would he want to make love to someone that appears to be the cause of all his troubles? This is why guys turn to porn and affairs. There is no BAGGAGE in an affair or porn. There is no need to do any work in an affair or porn. It is all superficial, shallow and hollow.......which is how most guys operate anyway.
You want more and he doesn't have a clue.
relax mommy...help is on the way.
EDcould be it. did you get fat with you having a babby? usally thats not an issuse but men are all fucked up you know this right right? so im not going to preech to you but,,,,,have you tried to suck his dick? loose some weight. get some real sexy nigety stuff. like chrchless panties. i know, i know. you feal strange but to him its OOOH.!! YAHHAAA!!! ok what about being a stripper? get a pole in the house. shit i can put one in very quickly only a few screws and a plum bob to make sure its stright..
my point to you sweety. its a job being married, it is not like high school. pressures in life and with jobs and shit.... you got to work at a marrage. i know cos i was fooled and i had a baby and she is now only to use me and keep me from my son. yea it sucks but what the fuck am i soposto do? hell
EDcould be it. did you get fat with you having a babby? usally thats not an issuse but men are all fucked up you know this right right? so im not going to preech to you but,,,,,have you tried to suck his dick? loose some weight. get some real sexy nigety stuff. like chrchless panties. i know, i know. you feal strange but to him its OOOH.!! YAHHAAA!!! ok what about being a stripper? get a pole in the house. shit i can put one in very quickly only a few screws and a plum bob to make sure its stright..
my point to you sweety. its a job being married, it is not like high school. pressures in life and with jobs and shit.... you got to work at a marrage. i know cos i was fooled and i had a baby and she is now only to use me and keep me from my son. yea it sucks but what the fuck am i soposto do? hell