My groom is refusing to cooperate with me?

2

23yo Mum of 2

New member
In regards to what he will wear at our wedding. We are having a small beach ceremony and I had envisioned him wearing a white long sleeve collared shirt with some maybe light brownish or creamy coloured pants. I told him today and he is saying he wants to wear a suit. Our wedding is so informal, I just wanted it to be casual and if he wears a suit don't our family have to wear suits too? I also wanted to go barefoot since its on the sand and just have thongs to put on after (thongs being flip-flops, I'm an aussie!)
Anyway what suits grooms for beach weddings best??
I am not being a bitch I just am non-traditional and its a non-fancy wedding, dont see how a tux would fit in with that. Maybe a white suit???
Jaz, thats exact pic i get, with 2 or 3 undone buttons, he will look HOT especially with his brown skin. Thats what i imagine him looking like in the photos loose and casual but gorgeous and playing with the kids by the water
Thats right B2B I have told him I will cancel the whole thing if he dont wear what I pick for him! Not like I wanted to plan the wedding myself, I hate organising things and getting stressed, so why should he decide he doesnt want to fit in with me and the bridal party??
Wifeforlife- Our gorgeous 3 year old daughter is the product of the 1% chance of getting pregnant while using condoms. We chose to become a family instead of having our baby aborted, what is not commendable about that?
We wanted a 2nd child and there is a 3 year age gap between them. Now stop being a cow.
Please.... we have made it 6 years together so far, if I tell him I wont be marrying him if he wears a suit he knows I am joking, Im taking Stephanies advice, ultimately he can choose but I will look up some pics and give him a look at what I was suggesting for his outfit because I think its sounds more casual than it looks. We have a great relationship, we truly do, I can be a bit stubborn at times (so can he) but we work things out.

I think someone has the impression that only my family is coming, thats untrue his parents, brother and sis and their fams are coming, my parents and my brother are coming and ONE of my friends who has been my best buddy since 1994 and is more like a sister to me.

And also one of my highschool friends who is a graduate photographer as she is doing our photos for free :D
Allie - I was joking when I told him this, yes I would be a cow if I didnt marry him over clothing. I am just asking a clothing question here, of course I'm gonna try to persuade him to wear my idea coz it will look cool. Wishing I never asked this question, you all must think my guy is a doormat or covered in bruises hehe
kill_yr_television - lol I hardly believe trying to get a guy to wear a particular shirt is the same as acting out sick fantasies with a prostitute. Besides, I won't be paying him.
 
Please do everyone a favor and save your "fantasy" to act out during the honeymoon when it is just you and your man who will be affected. Trying to force everyone to conform to your "vision" is making a monster of someone I suspect is usually kind and caring. I'm reminded of those sickos who compel women (wives, prostitutes) to act out some bizarre and highly detailed sexual fantasy.
 
Honestly, he is not telling you what to wear for a dress so while you can give him ideas and give him your opinion, you cannot TELL him what to wear nor does he need to compromise with you on his attire choice!

Your groom should be able to wear what he wants. It's his day too, don't you want him to feel confident and handsome? Plus, while he may be a little dressed up, its not as if he's trying to go too casual. I could understand if he wanted to wear a linen suit and it was a black-tie event, but so what if he wants to get dressed up on his wedding day?! Besides, if he wears the suit its likely he will get warm and end up ditching the jacket after a little while which will make it seem a bit more casual.

Either way, it is his decision... I wouldn't push the issue with him. If its important to him to wear a tux or suit, then just let it go! There are more important things to worry about!
 
Wow. Sounds like you've pretty much gone through life doing things totally YOUR way so far and are not into compromising one bit. i mean, your username is 23YO mother of 2 so it's not like you've followed anyone's advice so far, is it? You don't want to include his family members just because they have a bigger family than yours, you don't want your guy to wear what he wants, you want your wedding to be a few miles away so you don't have to include friends ONLY YOUR one friend (no mention of any of his)..if I were your fiance and reading your posts, I'd grab my car keys and head for the furthest part of the island I could find. He is in for a bumpy life ahead!
 
He is not refusing to cooperate, you are. You should have written "My groom is refusing to do what I say"!

Why cant he wear a suit to a beach wedding? A suit is ALWAYS appropriate, my dear. It doesnt mean your guests have to wear a suit. Dont fight this one. Its not worth it.
 
That is funny...most men HATE to wear suits in hot beach weather. I think the informal look looks the best at informal beach weddings. Depends on what types of picture you want to take I guess. Tell him to wear the suit to the beach one day...that should change his mind.
 
i would say casual. but remember it's the biggest say in both of your lives! just talk it out and see what u can compromise on maybe :)
 
lol what's funny is, as soon as i read beach wedding.. i thought of a long sleeved white loose shirt w| a few buttons unbuttoned and sleeves unbottoned w| khaki pants and barefoot walking up the beach w| wind blowing.

i think you should gather up pictures of beach weddings and see how all men are dressed and show him how they're dressed. maybe the both of you will learn new options.

i personally love the outfit you liked. :)
 
Let him pick his own attire and you pick yours, are you not going to marry him if hes not in the shirt you want him to wear?

I dont blame your fiance, Im sure you probably have planned the whole wedding and this is one thing he wants to chose himself

Edit: Your a b!tch!
I hope for your fiances sake he realises how rediculous you are, you cant control people , people need to make their OWN decisions, if your this embarrassed by your fiance or feel he cant make good choices on his own, your better off finding another man with a soft shell that you can manipulate, youve seem to loose sight of what this day is about, its not about the shirt, its about the marriage..snap out of it bridezilla before you ruin your marriage before it even begins
 
Wow you are not just a bridezilla, you are an outright cow.
you would cancel your wedding just because your fiance doesnt want to dress casual on HIS wedding day. thats right, he is getting married to, he is the Groom. I think you need to put things in perspective! if your Husband to be wears a white linen suit instead of a shirt and pants will it really ruin everything? will what he wears change a single aspect of your marriage? thats what the wedding is about you know, getting married and beginning a new stage in life.
what would you think if he said he would not marry you unless you wore a certain kind of dress, and it was something you didnt like. I immagine you would be hurt to say the least. Think about him, if you do infact love him you should be able to consider his wants, needs, and feelings. Believe it or not guys have those.
 
Your choice seems more appropriate for a beach wedding. However, if he wants to wear a suit that should be fine. Remember, it is his wedding too and he should be comfortable and no, the other family members do not have to wear a suit as well.
 
"My groom is refusing to cooperate with me?"

Do you have the slightest idea how you sound??

Do you have HRH in front of your name, or do you wear a tiara or a crown on your head? Do you expect everyone to bow to your wishes?

Crimeny, woman !!

It's NOT JUST YOUR DAY, ok !?!?!

He's not "your groom". He's the poor man who is stuck with you being a bridezilla on your high horse, thinking that he has to genuflect because you want something your way.

Yea, I know the tone of this is harsh ... but omG do you ever need to hear it !

You know ... you could do a LOT worse than a man who wants to elevate HIS WEDDING into something special, and who wants to dress it up.

Go and apologize to him and tell him that you're being a silly goose (or whatever you Aussie's say when you're being a bonehead), and that he can wear whatever makes him feel good.

*big hug* congrats and the best of luck to you !!

P.S. Ok having read your additional comments and that you will cancel the whole thing if he doesn't wear what you want him to wear ...
Well, I guess this poor guy is going to spend the rest of his life being dictated to by you. That's real sad .,. but then again, he might come to his senses and call it off himself.

:D
 
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