My first rant here

shilo h

New member
Ok, this is probably going to be a long read, I don't know yet for sure, because I'm just going to write some crap that irritates me and that I just don't like.

First of all, I have to say that I have OCD ( Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) so, yeah, you can say I'm a little mentally ill or something, but I don't see myself that way. Why did I say that I have OCD? To be an attention whore? Ask yourself this, why the hell should I draw attention on a message board? Well, ok, it can be fun and all, but hey, who am I?

Ok, second of all, English is my third language, so if anyone's going to reply to my rant or something, don't bitch about my grammar or spelling.

I had a good day, I saw Batman Begins, and I really liked it. Then I came home. Because me and my mother aren't very welthy ( you can say we're poor), she took 2 guys in house, some foreigners who came here to work. One pays us every month about 225 Euros, and one does chores in and around the house. I agreed with that, because we really need that money, but here's the deal. My mother has to work very hard for money and crap, she has like 3 diffirent jobs, and it's been changing a lot lately, because we're also foreigners. It doesn't matter that we're already been here for 12 years, they still won't give my mother a decent job. And before you guys start bitching about how I don't have a job, I have, and I'm also paying the bills with her.

What irritates me is that my mother also likes to bitch a lot like me, lol, and an hour ago, I saw here doing some stuff in the room those 2 guys sleep, she was like, moving crap, so they had a better place to sleep in. I was pissed of by that because she always does that kind of crap, while it doesn't even have to be done. She's always moving stuff, and now she has some of her clothes in my room. As you already have read I have OCD, some weird form of it too. I am disgusted by my mother ( or is it the other way around? like, I can't stand her), in a way you all can't comprehend. Whenever I see her, I feel icky inside, like I want to puke, I want to scratch out my eyes ( not that she's ugly, I don't know actually, but a lot of people her age [ 54] said that she looked good). And whatever she touches, I can't touch, if I touch it by accident, I have to scratch of that piece of skin I touched it with. Like my hand just a second ago, i touched the chair she was sitting on, and I scraped my hand over the wall just to get rid of that fucked up feeling. And yes, if you're wondering I'm standing while I'm writing this, because I can't sit on the freaking chair because my mother has been sitting on it all night >_<

This OCD stuff has taken over my life. Everything filthy that I see, I can't stand or something, I have to sratch in my eyes ( really) to try to get that vision out my eyes. And i spit a lot too, like I have the bacteria in my mouth when I say a dead cat for example.

She's touched almost everything in my room, because of the stuff she's moved. This may sound funny to you, butt it's hell for me. I can't even breath normal because of her scent.

Alright, I've figured out that this topic is about me and OCD. No, I haven't been to a doctor about this, I just came to a conclsuion via reading articles on the internet, and no, I haven't told anything to my mother.

I'm doubting about the fact if I shall post this or not, but hey, I will because I've been typing this long.

I probably forgot about something, if so, I'll post that later.

Oh yeah, I'm 16, and no, I'm not suicidal, I enjoy life.

I know I can't typ good, have a nice day.
 
I really don't have anything to add about your post. However, I'd like to tell you that at 16, with English being your third language, you type more articulately and semantically than most Americans of your age. (and some quite a bit older) That says a lot. :thumbsup:
 
Holy shit. English as a third language and you put together a more coherent post that half the fucknuggets with English as a first language.

Wish I could tell you something that'd make it better man. You just gotta do your best. And try not to scratch out your eyes. That's bad for your health. I know you're broke, but is there any sort of free therapy you can get? OCD can get worse without help. With help they can at least keep it where it is if not make it easier on you.
 
well, this is kind of the first time that I said that I have OCD, I told it to a friend of mine, but he didn't took it seriously. So, I feel uncomfortable saying in public I have OCD.

About the Eye scratching thing, I don't try to scratch out my eyes, it's kind of like, ehm...rubbing really hard over them :P

to get the image out of them, yeah I know it's weird
 
You know, strangely you sound like me. I know I don't have OCD, but I am disgusted by my father (what a co-inky-dink) all the dishes he uses I can't use even after its been washed repeatedly. I have to be at least 2 rooms away from him when he eats becuase its so disgusting, and even when he breathes it irks me becuase I can hear it and its just constant repetitive noise. Even though I don't take extreme measures to get him out of my presence, I loathe him! Most people would say I go too far, and that breathing is something everyone does, but when my dad breathes, just the way he does it, just drives me insane!

I sorta know how you feel, and it sucks I know! Like most of the other people said, talk to someone, I dont think it needs to necessarily be a professional, but maybe an adult you know, or a friend that won't react like the other one did!
 
It's nice to have some one who knows what I'm talking about, but on the other hand, it sucks for you to got through the crap I've been, and still am going through ( how fucked up can a sencence be :P).

But do you really think that I need to talk to someone IRL about this?? ( OCD)

If you do, it'll be hard for me to find someone who can hear all that crap, because I'm the kind of dude who doesn't want to sound angsty........and....I don't know what I'm trying to say, I can't like type it what I'm thinking, probably because lack of sleep and stuff.

So, I'm going to bed now, and I'll explain tommorrow what I was trying to say :P
 
Yeah, if your OCD is as bad as you say it is you probably should talk to someone. I don't mean a friend. I mean a counselor/therapist type of person. You can say whatever you want to say to them. OCD can be problematic for some people and it's best if you can get help before it gets worse.
 
I have one thing to say: Zoloft. It helps me with my depression (I should make a rant about that). One of my friends, with ocd, just started taking it about a month ago. It has hepled her. It hasn't cured it, but she can go out in public without a purse full of wet-wipes.
 
well, I'll think about that, thanx for the advice/tip.

but since this is my rant topic, I'd like to say, that my girlfriend just dumped me

the slut
 
i usually snag pens from everyone and everywhere... weather I need one or not.. I could have 3 pens in my pocket and still snag one.. is that an OCD? so far i figured I was just being a dick and cheap...
 
No, I think you're a klepto, you just haven't moved onto bigger things.
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