care if he's ok? ok so my parents are getting divorced and my mom got a restraining order on my dad so i havent really been keeping in contact with him but yesterday we got a call from the insuranse people asking for information on a car accident we hadn't even heard of yet (involving a DUI) and whilst my family was running around looking for info i just sat there and wondered if he got my letter stating i wanted nothing to do with him untill he was sober for at least a month strait with a snide remark at the end stating. " So i guess i'll never see u again " So should i feel bad or do you think im botteling up emotins (P.S. we still don't know his condition)
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my dad got in a drunk driving accident and totalled his car is it bad that i dont
- Thread starter brandon
- Start date
Myth_Understood
New member
It looks like you're probably just numb.
This isn't a surprise, because I bet that letter really hurt you to write. It must have been awful to have to live with a man who is unable to control his drinking, and that he is the cause of so much pain and grief for you. I can't begin to imagine how hard your life has been while you watched him self-destruct, break promises, forget things he said he would do, and drive your mother to get a restraining order against him. It's sad, on so many levels, what you've had to endure and you have every right to your feelings.
It is said that every alcoholic, druggie and people who have other addictions all have to hit rock-bottom before they can start to get better. Maybe this is the jolt he needs to start getting better.
In the meantime, if your father is only injured to the point that he will have a full recovery, don't see him until after a month of him not drinking. DON'T CAVE IN ! No matter what anyone says, you have your standards, and the price of admission to see you is 30 days sobriety. If anyone gives you one word about "he's your father, and he wants to see you," tell them to mind their own business. This is be
This isn't a surprise, because I bet that letter really hurt you to write. It must have been awful to have to live with a man who is unable to control his drinking, and that he is the cause of so much pain and grief for you. I can't begin to imagine how hard your life has been while you watched him self-destruct, break promises, forget things he said he would do, and drive your mother to get a restraining order against him. It's sad, on so many levels, what you've had to endure and you have every right to your feelings.
It is said that every alcoholic, druggie and people who have other addictions all have to hit rock-bottom before they can start to get better. Maybe this is the jolt he needs to start getting better.
In the meantime, if your father is only injured to the point that he will have a full recovery, don't see him until after a month of him not drinking. DON'T CAVE IN ! No matter what anyone says, you have your standards, and the price of admission to see you is 30 days sobriety. If anyone gives you one word about "he's your father, and he wants to see you," tell them to mind their own business. This is be
In short, yes it's bad that you don't care if he's ok or not.
Alcohol addiction is an illness and like any other addiction, is hard to overcome.
Your method of dealing with it is inappropriate in my view. I think threats and cutting contact is counter-productive. An alcoholics' reaction to stress and ultimatums is to reach for the bottle.I think that if your father manages to quit drinking it is despite your intervention.
You had the option of playing a supportive role and helping your father beat his addiction. You could have overseen his recovery and been there for him while he was getting better.In my view your failure is just as great as your fathers', and I'm not sure that I'd want someone like you as a son.
I can only conclude from your question that you are morally bankrupt, heartless, or both.
Alcohol addiction is an illness and like any other addiction, is hard to overcome.
Your method of dealing with it is inappropriate in my view. I think threats and cutting contact is counter-productive. An alcoholics' reaction to stress and ultimatums is to reach for the bottle.I think that if your father manages to quit drinking it is despite your intervention.
You had the option of playing a supportive role and helping your father beat his addiction. You could have overseen his recovery and been there for him while he was getting better.In my view your failure is just as great as your fathers', and I'm not sure that I'd want someone like you as a son.
I can only conclude from your question that you are morally bankrupt, heartless, or both.
In short, yes it's bad that you don't care if he's ok or not.
Alcohol addiction is an illness and like any other addiction, is hard to overcome.
Your method of dealing with it is inappropriate in my view. I think threats and cutting contact is counter-productive. An alcoholics' reaction to stress and ultimatums is to reach for the bottle.I think that if your father manages to quit drinking it is despite your intervention.
You had the option of playing a supportive role and helping your father beat his addiction. You could have overseen his recovery and been there for him while he was getting better.In my view your failure is just as great as your fathers', and I'm not sure that I'd want someone like you as a son.
I can only conclude from your question that you are morally bankrupt, heartless, or both.
Alcohol addiction is an illness and like any other addiction, is hard to overcome.
Your method of dealing with it is inappropriate in my view. I think threats and cutting contact is counter-productive. An alcoholics' reaction to stress and ultimatums is to reach for the bottle.I think that if your father manages to quit drinking it is despite your intervention.
You had the option of playing a supportive role and helping your father beat his addiction. You could have overseen his recovery and been there for him while he was getting better.In my view your failure is just as great as your fathers', and I'm not sure that I'd want someone like you as a son.
I can only conclude from your question that you are morally bankrupt, heartless, or both.