Mom is against me going to college and wont get me a car...HELP?

R

ReeseCup c/o 09

New member
Im 17 years old and Im going to college in August. Its 2 hours away from home. My mom doesnt really want me to go, but I got a grant to go to that college...so i wont have to pay for it. Its a private 2-year school. I have a 5 month old daughter, will be about 8 or 9 months when I leave to go to college. My daughters dad and grandma said they'll take custody of her while I go and try to make something of myself. (Keep in mind that they have her most of the time anyway) Im not worried because I know that she'll be in good hands. My mom doesnt think i should go because she says I need to be there for my daughter, but its only a 2 year school and Ill be back on breaks, and in the summertime. Im trying to make a better life for me and my daughter. When Im done with school, ill have everything under control. Do you think Im leaving my responsibilities???? And because I want to go to college 2 hours away...my mom isnt getting me a car....should I get a car loan????

BTW im going to college for free.
 
i think it would be irresponsible to pass up the oppurtunity to get an education which will be better for your daughter in the long run. so i think your right. and you'll probably have to get a car loan. good luck with that.
 
i deffiantly think that you should go because you are probably never going to get that chance again and I think that you should see if you can save up until august for a car like make a couple grand a car doesnt have to be that exspensive
 
You know you can go to college and take care of your daughter. You dont have to give her up to make something of yourself.
 
It's sad to see you giving up your child for a couple years, but it's great that you're going to college. Is there no way you could be more active in her life than just every few months? Those early years lost will cost you some serious bonding and closeness- something I lost with just a few months with my first child (I was ill for her first 3 months and she was cared for by everyone else but me most of the time- the difference between how well bonded I am to her and to my second which I cared for the entire time is HUGE).

You cannot force your mom to get you a car, either. So if you really want one or need one get a loan to buy one yourself or take the bus. Often schools hae cheap bus passes. Ours offered a bus pass good for August to May for $80 (it's $65 a month for anyone else). So it's a great deal if you use the bus.

I wish you the best of luck and hope everything works out for you and your family.
 
It's great that you're trying to better yourself; fantastic that you have support from your in-laws and wonderful that you have been able to get such a good form of financial assistance. I have never heard of a two-year school that has a residency capability, but more power to you with THAT. But keep in mind that a two-year school doesn't give you a college degree, just an "associate's" degree. And even people with full baccalaureates don't "have everything under control." If you mother can afford to help you get a car and isn't doing it because she thinks you are shirking your responsibilities, she is not being fair. If you don't have a job you are unlikely to be able to get a car loan. Have you tried to find another relative who might help you get just a "transportation" car for a few hundred bucks. But if you are going to be in residency at the school, you might not NEED a car.
 
I think you should go to college, but I also think you should mother your child, because she's very little and needs mothering...unless you plan to relinquish custody to her dad and his mom permanently.

It's not like you can just drop back into her life after 2 years as if nothing ever happened. Either be her mom or don't. Why can't you go to college and still be her parent? Why can't you find a way to make both work? If you got a grant for one school, it is surely applicable to a school in your town so that you can be at home every night.
 
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