Military Relationships?

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ut.sniper

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If your man is in the military; can you be faithful? I don't have girlfriend or wife, but I'm generally interested in how you cope? If I did have a lover and she wasn't faithful to me while I was gone, and I was sending her money, my heart would be absolutely crushed if being apart wasn't bad enough. I don't have anyone to worry about when I enlist thankfully, but I feel for those who do. Or maybe you split up before your partner enlisted because you'd know it would be too hard?
 
Im 16 and thinking am goin to enlist as a medic after uni and i wondering whats its like to have a wife or girlfriend while away. Have starred you n ill loook back later.
 
It does not just have to be the Military. Many UK citizens work overseas and if like me you could work15 to 26 weeks away without any holiday.

What I found was that while I was home it was like courting all over again and great fun bu when I came home for good things really did hit a bad spot. You see my wife had her own routine and my being home upset that routine. there were now two of us to make the decisions on even the smallest things like food.

We battled through it and are ok now but it took nearly a year.
 
My man was overseas for three tours with the military in the first couple of years we were together. In fact the first year we were together I saw him for exactly a third of the year! I was really hard to be without him all that time and I missed him like crazy but I was never unfaithful to him, and never would be. The worst bit is how much the Army mess about and change their minds about things - dates of departures/arrival, weekend duties, postings, everything else. It's like your entire life is dictated by them. It sucks if you are planning special events because it could all change the next day.
I do know women who mess around while their hubby is gone, but it definitely isn't every military wife/gf. The majority are faithful. The pressure of Army life is another thing, though, and many people can't bear it.
Luckily my man is now out of the Army and we get to spend a lot more time together. I love having him all to myself again.
 
a person will cheat if they are going to cheat. their job has nothing to do with nor does long periods of time away from oneanother.

only you know if you can be faithful and if you are willing to trust that the other one is too.

in 15 years of being a military SO/spouse I have seen ONE marriage fail..and cheating WAS NOT the reason.
 
One of the sad realities of military life, you have choose someone who can keep their knickers or pants on!
 
it goes both ways.

I have seen spouses do a 180 degrees turn about when their spouse deploys. And then I have seen and heard stories about soldiers that deploy. "The what happens in Iraq, stays in Iraq type thing"

I am sorry to hear about your situation but there are some women like that, just like there are some men like that.
 
They told me in boot camp that if the Navy wanted me to have a wife, they would have issued me one.

I had a girlfriend who couldn't wait. It wasn't pleasant, but I made up for it overseas MANY times over.
 
Some can't and some can. I've known plenty of guys who have gone into the armed forces with different experiences. I, myself, was extremely worried about him cheating on me. But to answer your question, yes we can. A strong woman only makes her man stronger. We haven't seen each other in 6 months and I'm still growing strong and faithful, but believe me there is a technique to it!=P


P.s. He is stationed about 1200 miles from me currently....
 
my boyfriend is a soldier on tour in afghanistan and yep its the hardest thing. I dont see why anyone couldnt be faithful to them whilst theyre away, i get really lonely but i wouldnt want anyone else, and i knew he would be away at work alot when we started being together. Youve just got to get used to coming second to the army!! being apart is actually crushing and there are days when im so low i just stay in bed and cry!! but i know it will be worth it when he gets back and that hes going through the whole being apart thing but in much worse situations so all i can do is be supportive and make sure he knowshow much i love him. coping is....interestingespecially as being a girlfriend you dont have the whole other army wife thing going on around you and none of my friends understand. but hes wirth it all and you will find someone who will be able to put up with it all. :)
 
My husband and I have talked about this a lot. His father made the mistake of telling me how much the guys on his crew (he was also in the military) used to cheat on their wives! My husband is going overseas soon and I am certain that he has nothing to worry about. I will be here waiting for him when he comes back. And he has told me the same. But we aren't naive enough to think that we could never be tempted when we are away from each other. I think that's why it's important to talk about how we feel and make sure that we are honest with one another when we are going through a difficult time or having trouble coping with a deployment. Talking as often as possible and keeping conversations positive means that we won't feel the need to go looking for companionship elsewhere. In the end, it's a choice you make to be faithful.
 
They buy packets of OMO laundry detergent and stick them in the window. This signifies the "Old Man's Out" and woopie... like moths to a candle your poor pining other half isn't so much of a fraction.
 
Well, I'm in the Navy and I'm married and people always tell me, Oh, that doesn't mean anything. I'm about to go on deployment for 6 months (wish I could disclose more) and my husband is going to be here. I trust my husband not to go out and do anything stupid while I'm away and supporting our family. There are some things you can do to protect yourself if you do go on deployment and get married. First thing is to open up a separate account with just your name on it. Set up an allotment to go to that account and leave only the money that you're required to give to your dependent (BAH, BAS, Family Sep) and then allot the rest to your private account. The reason I say that is because some spouses cheat on their husbands or leave their husbands/wives and when they get back from a deployment they don't have anything left for them and there is nothing that they can do about it. I always tell my husband that if he EVER tries me like that, I'd better not find him when I get back because if I do.......
 
It happens all to much in the military with military spouses. Its the sad truth. They get lonely while we are gone and do it for some reason. The way that i would cope with it would be to break up. But some people in the military have open relationships while they are away from eachother to each is his own.
 
Unfortunately, it does happen... but there are also spouses out there that remain faithful. The same problems that exist in the civilian sector exist in the military as well. I think it's just talked about more because of the deployments and whatnot.
 
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