hunneybunney
New member
My son is 11.
When he was about 5 (second year of primary school) he suddenly developed an aversion to learning. I think the first year (reception class) is more about learning through play. In the second year he had to start reading to the teachers and writing etc. He wouldnt read for the teacher and at home he would get himself so upset about it that I used to have to leave him for a while to calm himself down before we started reading.
I spoke to the school because I was worried that a teacher had said something nasty to him that had scared him about reading out loud ie put him down.
Over a time it became clear that he had a fear of failing and wouldnt actual engage in anything that could mean that he could fail at. He wouldnt do anything remotely sporty where he would have to compete. At 8 he went to Cubs/Scouts which he liked for a time and we tried karate which was a disaster. He would come out crying every lesson. I watched him go to peices when the instructor told him how to perform a certain move and correct him on his posture. He never went back again.
His reluctance to learn or be taught has hindered him his whole life. He is at secondary school now (year 7) and is beginning to get a lable for himself. I am getting letters home saying that he has been disrupting the class by refusing to do his work. This may sound like your average rogue child who needs an asbo but that isnt what he is like. He is the sort of child who hugs his mum before he goes out and when he comes home, watches tv in bed with me, looks out for his little sister, helps around the house and sits for hours with his terminally ill 85 yr old great grand mother talking about the war! He isnt a tyrant he is a good boy. His writing standards are so far below par that i actually struggle to read what he has written. He is good at maths but obviously his presentation lets him down. I dont want for him to have to go through his school life being labelled as the bad kid who doesnt want to work and worry that as he is already so far behind they will simply give up on him as they already seem to have. He does not act like a wild kid, ie doesnt display the behaviour of ADHD. No manic behaviour...
Until school age he had been the life and soul of the party. Loved going to parties, playing with other kids. Was an average walker and an early talker. Was always above the 90th centile on his progress chart (the little red book health visitors chart).
At around about the same time as he started not wanting to complete basic school tasks he also started to crave routine. He would want to know where me and my husband were at all times. Silly really but he would want my husband to get in the bath at 8pm every night. And as 8pm approached he would question him constantly 'daddy are you getting in the bath now, what time are you getting in the bath daddy, are you having a bath soon' sort of thing. If my husband broke out of this routine and went out for the night he would become really distressed and wait up until he came home. He still struggles to sleep sometimes not dropping off until me and my husband are in bed ourselves. He says this is because he is afraid we will split up one day which we have told him that isnt going to happen.
Something that also might be relevent is that at 4 yrs old he started having seizures. They only happened in the morning as his brain went from REM to waking. 1 of them in particular took him over 30 mins to recover from. He also had a few black outs and drop attacks. He also suffers from head aches from time to time. He has been alot better recently and hasnt had a seizure for about 2 years. He was never given any medication as it was decided that his seizures were so few and far between that it wasnt necessary.
Everything I have read about autism states that this is present and apparent from birth which means that he cant have that as he was a regular text book kid until age 5!
Im not going to stop until I find an answer...
Any experiences, advice or suggestions would be gratefully appreciated. Thanks
When he was about 5 (second year of primary school) he suddenly developed an aversion to learning. I think the first year (reception class) is more about learning through play. In the second year he had to start reading to the teachers and writing etc. He wouldnt read for the teacher and at home he would get himself so upset about it that I used to have to leave him for a while to calm himself down before we started reading.
I spoke to the school because I was worried that a teacher had said something nasty to him that had scared him about reading out loud ie put him down.
Over a time it became clear that he had a fear of failing and wouldnt actual engage in anything that could mean that he could fail at. He wouldnt do anything remotely sporty where he would have to compete. At 8 he went to Cubs/Scouts which he liked for a time and we tried karate which was a disaster. He would come out crying every lesson. I watched him go to peices when the instructor told him how to perform a certain move and correct him on his posture. He never went back again.
His reluctance to learn or be taught has hindered him his whole life. He is at secondary school now (year 7) and is beginning to get a lable for himself. I am getting letters home saying that he has been disrupting the class by refusing to do his work. This may sound like your average rogue child who needs an asbo but that isnt what he is like. He is the sort of child who hugs his mum before he goes out and when he comes home, watches tv in bed with me, looks out for his little sister, helps around the house and sits for hours with his terminally ill 85 yr old great grand mother talking about the war! He isnt a tyrant he is a good boy. His writing standards are so far below par that i actually struggle to read what he has written. He is good at maths but obviously his presentation lets him down. I dont want for him to have to go through his school life being labelled as the bad kid who doesnt want to work and worry that as he is already so far behind they will simply give up on him as they already seem to have. He does not act like a wild kid, ie doesnt display the behaviour of ADHD. No manic behaviour...
Until school age he had been the life and soul of the party. Loved going to parties, playing with other kids. Was an average walker and an early talker. Was always above the 90th centile on his progress chart (the little red book health visitors chart).
At around about the same time as he started not wanting to complete basic school tasks he also started to crave routine. He would want to know where me and my husband were at all times. Silly really but he would want my husband to get in the bath at 8pm every night. And as 8pm approached he would question him constantly 'daddy are you getting in the bath now, what time are you getting in the bath daddy, are you having a bath soon' sort of thing. If my husband broke out of this routine and went out for the night he would become really distressed and wait up until he came home. He still struggles to sleep sometimes not dropping off until me and my husband are in bed ourselves. He says this is because he is afraid we will split up one day which we have told him that isnt going to happen.
Something that also might be relevent is that at 4 yrs old he started having seizures. They only happened in the morning as his brain went from REM to waking. 1 of them in particular took him over 30 mins to recover from. He also had a few black outs and drop attacks. He also suffers from head aches from time to time. He has been alot better recently and hasnt had a seizure for about 2 years. He was never given any medication as it was decided that his seizures were so few and far between that it wasnt necessary.
Everything I have read about autism states that this is present and apparent from birth which means that he cant have that as he was a regular text book kid until age 5!
Im not going to stop until I find an answer...
Any experiences, advice or suggestions would be gratefully appreciated. Thanks