Looking to get some critism on my poetry?

  • Thread starter Thread starter I of Insanity
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I of Insanity

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[Confute]x[Falsify]

i kill what is in my dreams
i'll drink my poison tonight,
and sleep.
nothing here feels alive
there's no space to breathe
again I see the darkness,
i wait for it to leave.
broken eyes that nurse the restless,
I am crawling in my skin
literally, i shed myself,
every frozen limb.
I've forgotten the ways in which to comfort
in this moment, It feels so alone
hateful recognition
starts feeling more like stone.
there's nothing left to prove
your resentful jabs, so easy to remove
words shot like machine guns
watching your bullshit in reruns.


your venom is weak and powerless against me.
i wasn't asking for critism on grammar. i spell how i want, and i capitalize what i want.
 
thought this poem was great, i just read another poem and thought that was great but this beats it by miles!
Welldone and i think you should carry on writing! natural talent x
And a good point that you spell and capitalise as you choose as you could do that for effect, in poetry you dont have to follow rules, you make up your ownx
 
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