Last two days of shit.

  • Thread starter Thread starter bluegrizzly5
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bluegrizzly5

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I've had an enjoyable week so far!

  • My car insurance filed a charge of more than $1,700 for a vehicle crash that never even happened.
  • My car wouldn't start Monday afternoon to go out bowling. I tried Tuesday morning to go to work and it was fine. Then that evening, when I was going out to get something to eat, it didn't work again.
  • I almost killed my cat trying to make myself an omelette using a frying pan which caught on fire with the grease. In a lightning-quick intelligent decision, I threw the pan into the sink, hurling the half-assed omelette through the air which accurately targetted my cat's rear end. (This was Tuesday afternoon, $@*!ing car...)

Eh, it's actually not been that bad. I stopped myself because I think I'm bitching too much.

*EDIT* Isn't that the purpose of this forum, though?
 
;796139']Has it ever crossed your mind that your car may be a Transformer? Possibly a Decepticon? Especially with that attitude it seems to have.

But that gives you no right whatsoever to hurl flaming breakfast food at an innocent animal. You are sick indeed.
 
See that's why I didn't want to keep going with the list of things that have gone wrong thus far.

In reply to the car being a Transformer of some sort; I tried sticking my penis inside the exhaust pipe to see if maybe I'd get some reaction.
Turns out I did, and now it's a cancer spreading throughout my bladder.

My cat was fine, though. A bit of the egg got stuck on her tail but I took it off with some sulfuric acid and a blowtorch.
 
you don't use sulfuric acid on cat you use hydrochloric acid on a cat, and sorry about the cancer i will buy a red product in your name any your death will help a person i Africa with HIV

and about the car is it a starter problem or a engine problem
 
go under your car and hit the starter a few times. i had a stuck solenoid last winter, and i had to knock it at -30 weather, which sucked.

best of luck
 
I'll try that.

I already tried:
  • Hitting it
  • Spitting on it
  • Throwing it off a cliff
  • Clubbing it
  • Setting it on fire

So that's a good choice.
 
disconnect the started and reconnect it that might help from the sound of the problem you have a bad connection between the battery and starter.
 
That's animal cruelty! Call the cops on his ass! Just kidding. It sucks that your car didn't start, but maybe you should take it in to see if it needs some repairs.
 
Do you have an alarm that disengages the ignition?

I can't explain the frustration of someone not mentioning this to you when crawling under a car in a parking lot with a wrench. Freakin' girlfriends.
 
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