Canang Sari
New member
...OR Indian culture? I'm a non-Indian in the beginning of a romance with a religious Rajasthani Brahmin man. He's raised the topic of marriage (to me) - it's an ongoing discussion and I have not given him an answer.
While he's said beautifully romantic things that take my breath away, eg. how his wife would be his other half, etc, yesterday he made the disturbing (to me) request that I touch his feet on at least certain days of the year because it would "make him happy".
I know the custom is a fixture more in the north (India) but I had been under the impression it was usually demonstrated towards one's elders, gurus, national leaders or others above you in social rank as a symbolic form of worship and respect. Now, as someone who practices energy healing, I also understand in a very real way the exchange in the energy centres of the physical and subtle bodies such contact entails.
But to a might-be husband who is actually several years younger than me and would not be supporting me at least financially? I truly mean no disrespect to this custom though I have grappled with patriarchy in my own background and family history (and largely rejected it).
Does anyone have the reference to the Vedas where it says the woman has to do this to her husband - if so, could it have been corrupted or misinterpreted along the way and accepted unquestioningly?
When I asked him, he also said touching my feet in return, eg, in massage, would be degrading to him! He couldn't explain how this wouldn't be an act of submission on my part.
Any help or references to illuminate this would be greatly appreciated. I reiterate, I mean no offence to anyone. I'm trying to learn.
While he's said beautifully romantic things that take my breath away, eg. how his wife would be his other half, etc, yesterday he made the disturbing (to me) request that I touch his feet on at least certain days of the year because it would "make him happy".
I know the custom is a fixture more in the north (India) but I had been under the impression it was usually demonstrated towards one's elders, gurus, national leaders or others above you in social rank as a symbolic form of worship and respect. Now, as someone who practices energy healing, I also understand in a very real way the exchange in the energy centres of the physical and subtle bodies such contact entails.
But to a might-be husband who is actually several years younger than me and would not be supporting me at least financially? I truly mean no disrespect to this custom though I have grappled with patriarchy in my own background and family history (and largely rejected it).
Does anyone have the reference to the Vedas where it says the woman has to do this to her husband - if so, could it have been corrupted or misinterpreted along the way and accepted unquestioningly?
When I asked him, he also said touching my feet in return, eg, in massage, would be degrading to him! He couldn't explain how this wouldn't be an act of submission on my part.
Any help or references to illuminate this would be greatly appreciated. I reiterate, I mean no offence to anyone. I'm trying to learn.