is suicide right for me

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Blah, blah, blah, suicide's not the answer, blah, blah, blah. Look Onlyangel, a lot of people are going to throw shit at you about looking at what it will do to your family, life will get better, be patient, whatever. I came within inches of committing suicide, but I chose not to because of one person who was in my life at the time. Life wasn't just peachy after that, and it didn't get much better. My youth was fucked up, and my first boyfriend (the one who I used to say saved my life) fucked my life up even more when we broke up. I've been an emotional wreck for a long time until recently. Then I realized something, this life is mine. The present is mine to do what I will with. I could either sit around moping because I had a bitch for a stepmom who left and a birthmother who abandoned me, or I could get on with my life and enjoy what I had in the present. I had plans for my life, and I'm not about to let my past get in the way of me accomplishing those dreams. Do you have plans for life? If not, get some. Build your dreams and go for them. Focus all of your attention on getting yourself where you want to go, and everything else will fall away. You want to stop having sex? Do it. Why throw around your body like that? What purpose does it serve? It certainly won't help you accomplish your dreams. Get yourself away from the computer and go out. Hang out with your friends more. You don't have to dump all of your problems on them. Just enjoy the time you spend with them, even if all they talk about is boys. Learn how to talk to them or get some new friends. Most importantly, start doing your homework and caring about school. That school can get you going towards your future. If you fail in school do you really think you're going to be able to get away from the family you say is so fucked up? I don't think so. It's your life, throw yourself into it and make something of it. Sure, life isn't all roses and cream, but you just have to roll with that and learn to stand back up when it knocks you down. Take up writing to help you deal with the depression. Just write down everything you're feeling that day and why every night before you go to bed. You'll be amazed at how much better that alone can make you feel. I think someone mentioned volunteering, and I agree. That could help you feel better about yourself and you'll get the opportunity to see others who are worse off than you are. Take control of your life, don't let it control you.
 
The bottom line, and I agree with everyone else who says this, suicide is not the answer

If life at home is letting you down and your mother is treating you bad, then try this. Sit down for a moment and think to yourself. Think of stuff that your mother cannot take away. Stuff that makes you happy and glad to be alive. Then expend on them. You play DDR, so I'm assuming that you like music. Listen to music more often. Listen to music that make YOU feel happy. You like nature, so take walks more often. Get away from your house. And your mother who keeps saying things that keep putting you down. Live near a beach? In my opinion, beaches are one of the most calming things in the world. Just the smell and sound of the ocean can change your mood in an instant. Even if you live in a part of the world that actually has winter. Snowstorms on the beach are the best.

People call you fat... so what? Do you honestly think you are fat? All that matters is your opinion. Take me for example... I am a little over 6 feet tall and weight 317 pounds (just got off the scale just now), but I don't think that I'm fat. As long as I stay active, I think I'm perfectly fine.

If all else fails, then talk to someone. Someone who won't insult you. Someone who will listen to you. I'm sure anyone here will listen to what you have to say. There is already alot who do. Find people who have things in common with you. I'm sure there are people out there who can talk endlessly about nature and computers. People on this very site. I'm sure they will be happy to take a couple minutes to talk to a friend that has the same interests.

I hope this and the support of everyone else helps you.
 
I'm not going to make a huge lecture here but I do hope you read this out. Most people have said what needs to be said about your question. I certainly hope you will think about the seriousness of your thoughts and how cowardly your reaction of suicide is. I know you know better than to concider suicide as an answer to your problems. Life's a chore with many rewards. You just need to look at it differently even when things feel as bad as they are.

Anyhow, there is help. There's the suicide lines like those 800 numbers you can call. You might even find that out in the phone book or just call the operator. Those people will not call your mother or any family line because this is private not to mention free. if you have a doctor or can get a doctor that does not regularly talk to your mother, as that person if they know of a free clinic for a psychiatrist that can help you. You can always visit a hospital and ask them. I wasn't referring to a mental hospital either but that's an option. Some peopel like going there to just get away from all of life's responcibilities, but that might be a tough place and may not be what you need at the moment. You certainly aren't crazy and should feel you need a straight jacket. Bottom line, there's always help somewhere. If you need a friend to go with you to find this help you seek, ask your best friend to help you. That way you aren't alone and she can feel like she can play a part in helping you out.

I wish you luck. Please don't look at yourself as worthless or fat or listen to any negative thing people say to you. Most of the time, people say mean things because it's how they feel about themselves and you just become a target/sounding board for their bad self-opinions and insecurities. Just turn a deaf ear to that. You deserve so much more!

:hug2:
 
im a Sex Slave.I been doing sexual stuff sense i was 5.I dont know what to do i want to stop but i cant and i cant turn down an offer.I am a complete failer and i hide alot of things from my parents.[/QUOTE]

OnlyAngel, You are not interested in boys.. But you are interested in sex? Does Sex make you feel.. Loved? Or is it the only way you feel you can interact with people... through sex?

Suicide Is never the answer to anything Never does it help anyone. You Can make things better for you. Find something you like that is morally uplifting.. and I suggest never to have sex, do drugs or alcohol.
I feel really bad for you. And there are A LOT of people to tell you this. You CANNOT rely on people to get your problems done. Many have given you good advice that if you want to do get done you must do yourself.

Suicide? Atleast try for yourself.
 
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