Is life suposed to be this way?

2Pacalypse

New member
People don't control your self worth. You, and only you, control what you think you are worth. And I will agree with those who have said (in any of your threads) that you seem to have a problem with self-worth.

Just because I'm fucking only 5'4" or so, and about 125 pounds, doesn't mean I'm useless, even if people would think that. I might not be the smartest fucker around, but I'm always thinking, and can work as hard or harder than the average guy my age.



I finally finished paying off a loan. Now I have another loan, my credit card, and another couple grand on a charge account, to pay off. I have full house bills to pay every month, have to keep gas in the vehicle, have to fix my vehicle (although it still works OK), have to find money to go to a wedding at the end of June, and...I'm sure I'm forgetting something, cuz I always do. All this on about $1400 to $1500 a month. Plus, of course, I have food, smokes, beer, gotta find some more clothes sometime soon, gotta keep buying time for the cell phone, and maybe have a little left over so I'm not flat broke by next check. I'm also considering buying a place, so then I'd have a mortgage to keep up with.

As is, I figure if I got another loan, this time for about $7000 or $8000, I could pay off almost everything else I owe, and have a little left over to maybe fix my vehicle, and/or buy another one. I won't have any more money left over at the end of the month, but at least I'd have everything taken care of.



What you driving? An old thing, or something relatively new? I've had troubles, but I guess I can fix my own vehicle. Right now, though, I only have two forward gears, and no reverse. And, no money (as explained above) to pay for another transmission. Right now it's running fine, however, I have had troubles with it, and had to borrow a vehicle for a couple weeks before I could afford parts to fix it. Thankfully there was a vehicle I could borrow. Still, I'm not bitchin', as I don't think I have $500 into this vehicle yet! Including purchase price, not including gas and insurance, of course. I've had it for nine months.



Only issue here is that I don't have one, but I'm not even sure that's an issue. If it was, I'd probably be out of this shithole by now.



What kind of "friendship issues"? Friends are fucking with you, and really not being friends? Or friends are telling you all the same things we're trying to tell you? Or something else? Friends who simply screw with your mind and such are not really friends.



Tell me about it. I'm the black sheep of the family.



OK didn't you earlier complain about "money strains"? And now you're complaining that your wanted at work more than you want to be there? Then find a job that you'll like better, and not mind putting in more time, or a better paying job so you won't have to work extra time.



You're "overcomplicating" everything, it seems. Just gotta "roll with the punches", and take life one bit at a time. I've gotten major stressed out about a couple things before, but then I settled down and realized that circumstances don't control me. Maybe I don't control circumstances, as such, but in no way does that mean that I'm bending over backwards trying to keep up with everything. It's one step at a time.
 
Meh, I compare my current life to how I want it to me, and I still don't complain. Reason? Because I fucking put myself here! I'm the oldest in my family, and out of four of us brothers who are working full-time, none of us have a grade twelve certificate. The youngest (of us four) has a full-time job at an agricultural seed plant, and makes a bunch more than me. The next one up works full-time for a local farmer, and he has a fairly nice pickup truck to show for his work. The last one (1.5 years younger than me) has taken three years of college already, and works as a mechanic, making around $20 an hour, which is only going to go up as he gains experience.

Personally, I had a job up north that I really liked, and was making decent money at. But then when I got fired because I didn't get along with my manager (I still say he's a fucking dumbass), I decided to move back down here and get a job for ten dollars an hour, instead of finding another job up there for easily double that.

So, I could have stayed up there, made tons of money, gotten into a trade, and be doing great. Or, I could have gone the same route as the one bro and gone to college for a couple years, and be in the same position as him (as I would have taken the same course, and possibly still might, one day).

In summation, I only have myself to blame for where I am today. So I STFU and just focus on working my way up, while still trying to have a good time when I can! So far, so good!
 
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