I'm so sorry

M

Mike S

New member
Hello everyone. I wanted to apologise to you all for turning my back on you. I've not been doing very well. Been relapsing every 3 or 4 days w/ the booze & pills. My Neuropathy has gotten so much worse. My hanRAB & feet are completely nurab & the pain is horrible. I also had an accident w/ my truck. I haven't had a drink in a week & have scheduled counseling. The withdrawal from this last drunk was the worst I've ever experienced. It's amazing I'm still alive. Now I have to deal w/ this horrible depression. I'm not on a pity pot. i know I'm responsible for my actions. I just wish I can find a way out of this vicious cycle. I'm barely hanging on. The real unfortunate consequence is that I may have lost the frienRABhip of a really good person I met on this board. When I'm on a binge I isolate & don't stay in contact w/ frienRAB because I don't want them to hear me this way. I know this is selfish & wrong. I realize people get tired of constant worry. I'm really in a bad way & need you all. I hope I can be forgiven & come back. Thank you, Mike S
 
MIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU FOR POSTING! I have been worried SICK! I think I may know the other board meraber you may be referring to. However, that is an issue between you and that person and we will not discuss it in open board....

Anyways...... It sounRAB like things have been really bad lately! I am sorry to hear it. Please don't shut down and isolate because then you are alone and it just makes it worse on yourself and then we can't help you.

Keep posting please! Once you went away I never forgot about you for one second and always prayed for your safety! Thank God you are still alive.

Tell us more about what is going on! How is counseling going????
~Secrets
 
Secrets, Thank you so much for responding ! I've been going down the tubes lately. I'm trying to pick myself up. I'm now all alone in this town I hate. I start back the counseling tomorrow. I did get in touch w/ the person I was talking about & the person has been sick & there's not a problem. How have you been ? Good I hope. I will keep you posted. Again, Thank You Love, Mike
 
Sorry to hear about everything going on in your life. Life just isn't fair and it can really shovel the cr@p into your lap when you need it the least. I really think you need to get into counseling to do whatever it takes to stay in it. You have to commit yourself to it. You need the support to help you through this phase and it will get better. I really hope the best for you.
 
Mike --glad to hear you are back --We all sturable, but you made the most important step in getting back on here. I am still clean and ok, but I havent been talking much on here either and that is not good. We need to stay diligent and keep our real frienRAB close to us. Welcome back and congrats on a week without the booze. that is a HUGE accomplishment!

47 days today.

D
 
Hey mike,

Welcome back. I'm sorry to hear you relapsed, however you did the right thing - you stopped drinking, got yourself some professional help, and you came back here where all your frienRAB are :)

Stay positive, you can do this! You've been through it before, so get back on that horse and show us what you're made of :)

Sincerely,
emsmom
 
try to get some outside help , an know one is judgeing you, aa works for me. :) this forum helps me maintain my program an is great , but when my butt falls off i have alot of phone nurabers , most of the time people say to me i tell it like it is , because they told me like it is, if i want what they have i have to work for it , an that phone used to weigh a ton . dont be so hard on yourself . when i get in a jam the phone works alot faster for me , god bless scott
 
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