If your daughter graduated at 16 years of age is it good to tell her what...

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Sylvia T

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...university she is going to or is it? I am so confused. Proud parent of a 16 year old who is so intelligent but emotionally she is so love struck that it does not seem like she is making good choices. So, I stepped in and chose the university for her and now she is so upset. But I want to think of her future. Can anyone help us with this?
 
If you expect her to survive in the adult world of college/university, it is time you started treating her with some trust and respect. This is her life and her future. If she finished high school 2 years early, she is obviously a very bright girl. Now it is your turn to show your pride and confidence in her by allowing her to mature into her own person. She may be a couple of years younger than most high school grads, but she is not your little girl any more. You will just be giving her cause to resent you if you try to force her to conform her life to your own desires.
 
ask her what college she wants to go to and if ur paying for it u should at least have some say about the her choice but she'll get over it or maybe u could try talking to her intsead of rushing her into college because if she's not thinking straight r u really gonna feel comfortable sending her off on her own for the first time?
 
ask her what college she wants to go to and if ur paying for it u should at least have some say about the her choice but she'll get over it or maybe u could try talking to her intsead of rushing her into college because if she's not thinking straight r u really gonna feel comfortable sending her off on her own for the first time?
 
University demands huge commitment and if she steps in reluctantly there's no way she'll put enough efforts in it. Besides the field in which she'll study must be her choice, wouldn't want to put her in law if she's more into engineering or anything of the sort!
If she hasn't made up her mind yet, she's young enough to take a year off school and have a job in the meantime, the experience will teach her too, she'll have time to think and starting at 17 instead of 16 is still far from behind!
 
She should make her own decision. You can guide her but don't force her. She's obviously smart.
 
I graduated from HS at 14. I was allowed to apply to any college I wanted to. I applied to many colleges and was accepted at all of them. I dropped out of college at 16 and went back to college as an adult.

I think it is very wrong for you to pick her college for her. It is her life and she should be allowed to make her own decisions. She is growing up, and should start making her own decisions. One of those decisions SHE needs to make is where she wants to continue her education.

I don't understand why you could not pick them together (if you felt you wanted to be involved so much in the decision) ? You could have made a list of colleges she was interested in, visited the campus, made pro and con lists, and applied to colleges she felt would offer her the degree and best challenges she would be interested in.

Picking the college for her sends signals to her - that you don't trust her decisions, that she is and will always be a little girl, that she is not able to make decisions on her own, etc.

Are you going to attend college with her ? Go to her classes with her ? Are you going to pick her degree ? What courses she takes ?

I think your daughter is going to go through a rebellious period (teenagers do anyway) and you will have to suffer the consequences of what happens when you pick your child’s college for them.

She is also young enough to take some time off before college starts.

Think about this ----- if you are concerned that she is involved with someone that you don’t like (and that you feel may be a negative influence on her) – let me tell you something as someone who has “been there / done that”.

You are sending her in the opposite direction that you would like her to go to, and forcing her to make the exact choices and decisions you don’t want her to make.
 
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