I think my parents are keeping a secret from me...?
- Thread starter Brittni
- Start date
I'm a fifteen year old girl. Quite a while ago (in elementary school), I was looking through our file cabinet, and I saw a section labeled "Divorce". There were all these divorce papers in it. I asked my parents about it because I hadn't known anything about any previous marriages. But they made up a really lame excuse and denied that it was real. I was never clear about that.
Then today their marriage certificate was on the counter because my brother had to get a passport, so I took a peek at it. Sure enough, there was one previous marriage listed for both of them! I can't believe they never told me.
I want to ask again, but I'm kind of scared. And I don't know if my brother should be there too. How should I act?
Then today their marriage certificate was on the counter because my brother had to get a passport, so I took a peek at it. Sure enough, there was one previous marriage listed for both of them! I can't believe they never told me.
I want to ask again, but I'm kind of scared. And I don't know if my brother should be there too. How should I act?
All families have secrets and I think most families have secrets that come out. At some point, you will be able to talk to your parents about this, but I wouldn't rush it. I'm sure they knew at some point that you would be old enough to find this out. So if you can, just try and let it be for now. What happened happened, and its all in the past now. And maybe your parents love each other even more because they've both been in marriages that didn't work out.
My parents did get divorced (when i was 12) and through the years I ended up finding out allot of secrets about my family. The worst was finding out my mom had been unfaithful to my dad many times over the years. The most difficult part was that it somehow felt like my childhood was not what I thought it had been, that it was somehow tainted by these secrets that I didn't know at the time.
It took me a few years to get over it, but now I realize that my childhood memories were all well and good. There are many things adults don't tell their children about, like past drug use, and that is the way it should be. Telling your kids too much can be inappropriate (trust me, I found out about things I did not wish to know!)
So, in the end, this wont seem like such a big deal, even though right now it does. Respect your parents wishes for now. I'm sure at some point in the future they will be more willing to discuss this with you.
My parents did get divorced (when i was 12) and through the years I ended up finding out allot of secrets about my family. The worst was finding out my mom had been unfaithful to my dad many times over the years. The most difficult part was that it somehow felt like my childhood was not what I thought it had been, that it was somehow tainted by these secrets that I didn't know at the time.
It took me a few years to get over it, but now I realize that my childhood memories were all well and good. There are many things adults don't tell their children about, like past drug use, and that is the way it should be. Telling your kids too much can be inappropriate (trust me, I found out about things I did not wish to know!)
So, in the end, this wont seem like such a big deal, even though right now it does. Respect your parents wishes for now. I'm sure at some point in the future they will be more willing to discuss this with you.