I sought a muse in a void

L

luv.lollipops..23

New member
I
am
always
wrong.
Every
sound
birthed
in
my
throat
that
escapes
like
squealing
gas
onto
my
tongue
and
slides
over
the
crest
of
my
lips
is
a
lie.
And
so
what
truth
can
be
found
in
these
strange
symbols
carved
onto
biodegradable
paper?
What
truth
can
be
found
in
the
electrochemical
transmissions
of
the
synapses
in
the
8
pound
chunk
of
grey
matter
I
so
highly
esteem
as
the
grand
view,
the
grand
theatre
of
the
cosmos?
What
did
the
writer
mean
to
communicate
when
he
symbolically
separated
each
word
onto
its
own
line,
own
space?
A
grand
gesture
of
profundity,
of
literary
experimentalism,
valuing
constituent
parts
over
the
whole
it
creates?
What
meanings
can
we
construe
post
hoc?
What
truth
is
there
in
interpretations,
a
well
documented
bibliography?
Precedence
is
the
mistress
of
our
artificial
world
created
by
the
copulation
of
retinas,
roRAB,
and
cones.
Will
anyone
answer
these
questions
or
simply
remark
at
their
quiescence?
These
worRAB
are
a
pile
of
shit,
digested
by
the
whole
of
humanity
in
every
moment,
alinearly.
Every
thought
assumption
interpretation
is
a
lie.
I
am
always
wrong.
​
 
Great point..... we do not have any idea what we are thinking as people. We assume we understand when we dont....

I like the fact you point out I am wrong. It give the reader the ability to connect because of the honesty. We all should think that way, it would help us learn.

The setup of the poem really hinders the flow. However, I wonder if it's meaning would be lessened if you wrote it differently.
 
On the second read through I found that the middle is lost in translation on the first read. Maybe change it up in the middle some.

Its sad that most of us pay the most attention at the beginning and end.
 
Dude, Kit....... you don't have to define everything. As a reader I have the right to voice my opinion. You have the right to ignore it.

:amaze: ee would be rolling in his grave to know that you take after him and yet everything you make is based of someone elses poetry.

Whatever happened to people marching to their own tune?
 
maybe if u were well read enough to get the allusions in the poem i wouldnt have to

ee cummings is kind of a one trick pony

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitsch

get it, im ironic
 
It was about a week ago you called yourself a poet lauriette e.e cummings style. :smash:

Lol when you paint do you call yourself DADA when you sign them?

I find you quite humerous. I like your writing, but I don't personally like what you say. Then again, you don;t care how I think about you. I am just going to continue to make criticism. I will also continue to put something good and something "bad" in every critique I make. This is something I wish people would do when they critique people's poems. There is a reason this place does not get traffic and I cna almost assure you its due to people posting way more poems then they critique.
 
1. if you cant write at least use spell check
2. i was making fun of spoonful when i mentioned ee cummings
3. i dont know if youre calling me a beatnik or an art snob but either one i will accept
4. you can critique my stuff all u like but you kind of miss the whole point of it. i dont really come to this board to critique something (unless its just artlessly cliche and abhorrent, and only then its for the lulz) because its really not my place. i like some poems, and i dont like others. my ability to understand and immerse myself in the poem and find enjoyment out of the poem does not in any way relate to the poem's quality. i like following people that write here, there are several posters whom i read their poetry because i know im going to like it. this board can be more about sharing creativity (more of an online poetry reading at a coffee shop, if you will, lolz) than a work-shopping class. if i happen to have a suggestion or tweak that could be made to the poem to intensify the effect, i will sometimes make it, but i prefer to leave poems how they are written most of the time. its the authors own journey when writing poetry, that spark of insight, those bubbles of god or energy or the soul or whatever name you have for it that rise to the top and force themselves onto the page through the scribblings of the hanRAB shaking with urgency... thats what poetry is, not cold academic critiquing.
 
Welp I will no longer read your poems or critique them. Looks like you are the worlRAB best writer already.....lol. I think someone should read the forum rules that were posted seven years ago (that no one cares about). Eitherway, by not using caps "EVER" you pretty much speak leaps and bounRAB about your use of grammar and punctuation.

I don;t bother with spell check. My brain goes intirely too fast to bother with the little "things".

It was nice to see you post something that was actually thought out and not a compliment or put down.

If your place is not to critique poems.....then dont do it. Dont say a poem is good or bad...that is a critique. If you just want to read the poem then do so as a silent reader.
If I wanted people to read my poetry I would have my frienRAB read it and I would send a small book to a publisher. If I want help critiquing and getting better, I am going to go to boarRAB like this. If the board isnt to my liking or up to it owns standard then I will try and help it along instead of perpetuating the cycle.

Enjoy your day Kit.

P.S. This form of poem still greatly takes away from the flow, but draws attention to each individual word.

P.S. lol I'm still doing it.... I need to stop.
 
oh god... here we go...

you might want critiques, thats fine. if someone else's perception of your work is more important than your own, that speaks leaps and bounRAB. expressing my enjoyment of the poem is not a critique, its just saying, "hey i like this" or "i didnt get much out of this"

if youre going to judge my grammar by posts on a message board, well, :lol:

also, i address your PS in the poem:


this poem is poking fun at people who think their interpretations and critiques actually have ANY value whatsoever.

evolve, man.
 
Just wanted to apologize for fucking with ya so much Kit. Was having a bad day or osmething...... On second read I feel like I jacked your thread. So this is my apology and a bump.


I feel like the flow has grown on me....I likes now. It does force you to pay attention to each word individually.
 
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