I need to hear a good joke or riddle?

Ok. this is actually a blonde joke. But im not wanting to be ''racist'' (although im blonde myself.) but ive changed it a little so here goes;

Q. How do you drown a dumb person?

A. Put a scratch n snif at the bottom of a pool
 
What do you call a cat that digs in the sand?
Sandy Claws! (Santa Clause)

Why did the Policeman arrest the cat?
Because of the kitty litter!

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Cause' he had no guts!

Which famous cat never got his feet wet?
Puss and Boots!

What did the boy say when he saw his dog lying in the sun?
"Hot Dog!"

What is a twip?
What a wabbit takes when it wides a twain!

How do you catch a squirrel?
You climb up a tree and act like a nut!
 
A blind man was walking down the street with his dog. They stopped at the corner to wait for the passing traffic.

The dog, at this point, started pissing on the mans leg.

As the dog finished the man reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a doggie treat and started waving it at the dog.

A passerby saw all the events happening and was shocked.

He approached the blind man and asked how he could possibly reward the dog for such a nasty deed.

The blind man replied "Oh I'm not rewarding him, I'm just trying to find his head so I can kick his fuckin' a$s."
 
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