Ibrahim Iqbal
New member
Hi ^^.
I'm entering this into the scholastic writing competition and I wanted to see what you guys thought of it. If theres anything that I need to revise or re-do just go ahead and tell me. I'm not really aiming to win the contest, it's just that if I enter the contest, our English teacher will bump up our lowest grade up by 10 points.
Anyhoo, heres the essay:
It’s been a good year for hate. To specify, let me give some examples. From the Israeli flotilla incident to the New York City Muslim community center to the numerous teenage suicides caused by one of the harshest forms of hate: Bullying. Hate is a strange phenomenon; it can afflict any type of person in the world, perhaps even the strongest and toughest man in the world. Even though he may have an unimaginable amount of physical power at his arsenal, he can be broken down into a meek, hurtful child. Hate can easily accomplish this. Bruises will eventually go away, but the emotional scars that hate engraves upon you will never forsake you.
So the question is, how do we defeat hate? Well, isn’t THAT the million dollar question. The honest and harsh truth is that hate is embedded inside every single human being and thus can never be depleted. As hard as we try to believe that hate can be eradicated, it will never happen. However, we can reduce hate, better than experiencing it to the fullest extent in my opinion. We can change ourselves, reshape our lifestyles so that maybe others will be inspired by us and they themselves will slowly remove the venom of hatred from their lives. But again, hatred cannot be expunged. Even if you take the deadly venom out of a snake, the snake is still particularly malignant. But never the less, you have still extracted the venom thus diminishing the amount of danger. Just like that, we must suppress and diminish hate; fight it with every inch of our will.
But with such a terrifying and tremendous enemy such as hate, I often think, will we ever win? I, myself, have been a victim of hate; it once led me to thoughts of suicide. My culture hides the idea of sex until a late age in order to protect us from lustful thoughts. We are taught to believe that if you wish to bear a child, you must go to the holy city of Mecca and pray to Allah for one. If Allah deems that you have led a faithful and satisfactory life so far, He will bless you with a child.
I believed in this concept until 7th grade in Junior High School, and because of this belief, I was tortured, harassed, and bullied all throughout both Elementary and Junior High School. People would bombard me with insults which would be inappropriate to even mention. To add on, this was not even the primary source of hate and bullying. The main source was my due to my race and religion. I would be called “Terrorist”, “Camel Jockey”, “Osama-lover”, “Towel Head”; the list goes on and on. After a day of being persecuted and tormented, I would come home to where my mother who would ask me to help her with cooking often. While I would be cutting vegetables or fruits with a knife, the back of my mind would whisper to me, “Stab yourself, just do it. At least if you do, you won’t have to endure all the harassment tomorrow. Your life isn’t worth it.” I was about age 12 at the time. Really? This is the horrid capability of hate; it gives thoughts of taking a knife and stabbing himself to a 12 year old child. It is a frightful thing indeed. We must subdue it as much as we possibly can. How many more lives will be lost until we realize this, especially young lives? I pray every day that it won’t be many. I would pray none at all, but sadly, that would not be realistic.
I'm entering this into the scholastic writing competition and I wanted to see what you guys thought of it. If theres anything that I need to revise or re-do just go ahead and tell me. I'm not really aiming to win the contest, it's just that if I enter the contest, our English teacher will bump up our lowest grade up by 10 points.
Anyhoo, heres the essay:
It’s been a good year for hate. To specify, let me give some examples. From the Israeli flotilla incident to the New York City Muslim community center to the numerous teenage suicides caused by one of the harshest forms of hate: Bullying. Hate is a strange phenomenon; it can afflict any type of person in the world, perhaps even the strongest and toughest man in the world. Even though he may have an unimaginable amount of physical power at his arsenal, he can be broken down into a meek, hurtful child. Hate can easily accomplish this. Bruises will eventually go away, but the emotional scars that hate engraves upon you will never forsake you.
So the question is, how do we defeat hate? Well, isn’t THAT the million dollar question. The honest and harsh truth is that hate is embedded inside every single human being and thus can never be depleted. As hard as we try to believe that hate can be eradicated, it will never happen. However, we can reduce hate, better than experiencing it to the fullest extent in my opinion. We can change ourselves, reshape our lifestyles so that maybe others will be inspired by us and they themselves will slowly remove the venom of hatred from their lives. But again, hatred cannot be expunged. Even if you take the deadly venom out of a snake, the snake is still particularly malignant. But never the less, you have still extracted the venom thus diminishing the amount of danger. Just like that, we must suppress and diminish hate; fight it with every inch of our will.
But with such a terrifying and tremendous enemy such as hate, I often think, will we ever win? I, myself, have been a victim of hate; it once led me to thoughts of suicide. My culture hides the idea of sex until a late age in order to protect us from lustful thoughts. We are taught to believe that if you wish to bear a child, you must go to the holy city of Mecca and pray to Allah for one. If Allah deems that you have led a faithful and satisfactory life so far, He will bless you with a child.
I believed in this concept until 7th grade in Junior High School, and because of this belief, I was tortured, harassed, and bullied all throughout both Elementary and Junior High School. People would bombard me with insults which would be inappropriate to even mention. To add on, this was not even the primary source of hate and bullying. The main source was my due to my race and religion. I would be called “Terrorist”, “Camel Jockey”, “Osama-lover”, “Towel Head”; the list goes on and on. After a day of being persecuted and tormented, I would come home to where my mother who would ask me to help her with cooking often. While I would be cutting vegetables or fruits with a knife, the back of my mind would whisper to me, “Stab yourself, just do it. At least if you do, you won’t have to endure all the harassment tomorrow. Your life isn’t worth it.” I was about age 12 at the time. Really? This is the horrid capability of hate; it gives thoughts of taking a knife and stabbing himself to a 12 year old child. It is a frightful thing indeed. We must subdue it as much as we possibly can. How many more lives will be lost until we realize this, especially young lives? I pray every day that it won’t be many. I would pray none at all, but sadly, that would not be realistic.