I have a poetry project, do these sound good?

L

Lauren

New member
I have to write a haiku, limerick, cinquain, lyrics, etc.
Btw... I am a ninth grade student.
Tell me if I need to change any of these:

Haiku:
Upon the tree branch
A hummingbird sings softly
Music to my ears

Limerick:
One sunny day at the park
Suzi had met up with Clark
Suzi sat in gum and got stuck
She exclaimed, " Just my luck!"
Clark laughed until twas dark.

Cinquain:
Jellybeans
Very colorful
So many flavors
My tastebuds thank me
Yum!

tell me what you think needs to be changed etc

THANK YOU.
 
Um. I don't really like them. A bit too cliche and cheery and happy for my taste. A bit... lame actually.

The limerick doesn't make sense. I KNOW it's a limerick, but the flow of poetry is really weird. The 2-3 line flow doesn't work too well, and neither does the first and last line(they seem, well, arbitrary).

Try different styles of poetry, these, like I said, are too cheerful. Go for at least neutral, maybe humorous, try darker poems.
 
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