I feel like I'm wasting life STUDYING - PLENTY Of other people out there who are better?

[The Y!A Reporter]

Hiya .

I'm 15, and I'm Year 10 - slowly heading towards my IGSCE Exams.

I feel like I'm wasting my time and tough-effort putting so much energy into strenuous studying. Why should I even bother? I get around 70s to 90s for most work. However, there is the solid fact that there is always going to be someone better than me - no matter how hard I try. I keep on trying, trying, studying, studying, and I'll end up getting a job that's alright - Yes I have dreams, but there are still always going to be people who are better.

Exams are especially intimidating to me. When sitting in an exam room I feel so small, as if a certain fraction of people are going to get much higher than me - even though I've already strained myself days and nights to do all that I POSSIBLY can.

This may sound pathetic, but I really just feel there is SUCH a HUGE percentage of people out there who are fully, thoroughly educated (as much as myself) and that I stand only a fraction of a chance to achieve certain things against millions of OTHERS out there with the SAME or BETTER Potential.

I guess I really just need to have some confidence and a motivation boost.

What are your thoughts on this issue?

Thank you so much for your help. I really really appreciate every little bit.

 

[Erik]

You should still try to learn because some of the material is worth knowing, and it is mental exercise.

Yes, doing well in school is sometimes just a basic requirement that many people meet. But many employers will not consider people who fail to do reasonably well in school. So you should try to do well.

What will really make you stand out is having other special skills that are not taught in school. Vocational and technical skills are good.

But what lets people succeed at work (and outside it too) more that anything is interpersonal communication skills. It's amazing how people will ignore your flaws or inferiority to others if you are really good in this department.

Social skills are complex. They take a good deal of effort to learn well. The ridiculous thing is that they are never formally taught in the school system. If you don't teach them to yourself, nobody will.

If you make a long-term effort to do that, you will have a huge advantage over everyone else.

Books are excellent third party resources. For example, there is "How to Win Friends and Influence People for Teen Girls" as well as the Dale Carnegie books that inspired it. Look for them at your library or nearby book store.

In my opinion, one of any person's absolute top priorities should be learning interpersonal communication skills. He/she will benefit from these when with friends, at school, at work... all the time.

There are lots of self-help books about improving interpersonal communication. Parents can search "conversation", "interpersonal communication", "etiquette", and related subjects in nearby libraries' catalogs. Or just go to a book store.

You should read as many of those books as possible; each one will have unique examples you will learn things from.

There is another book that comes very highly recommended by librarians, educators, and others (including myself). It is called "Changing Bodies, Changing Lives", written by Ruth Bell. It is partly a sex-ed book but it talks about relationships and other things. Part of the book's genius is that it includes many quotes from teenagers, who the teenaged reader is more inclined to listen to and consider relevant (instead of having only adults lecture and dictate to the teen).