I am not Fucking "gellin'"

B

Beer for you!

New member
So I am walking down the street at night in my shoes from hell. The inside soles is about as comfortable as cardboard. So I'm about 2 miles from my house, in the middle of nowhere, and it starts to fuckin' downpour. So now I feel like I'm walking on soggy cardboard. Itchy, soggy, cardboard. So I get home and my feet feel like raw salmon. I put them into the dryer with some baking soda, because my year old $30 shoes smell like a yeast infection. The next day I open the dryer and I find my shoes in a pile of what used to be my inside soles. I can't afford new shoes and I can't get Dr. Scholles (sp.?) because I can't find them anywhere thats affordable. I tried to go barefoot for one day, and it was 95, and the asphalt was hot enough to cook eggs on. So I get a blister and start to walk on peoples' lawns, and I get yelled at, so then I had to walk all the way back on the road. I want to cut off my feet and quit walking. I bet I can sell them on the black market for hundreds.
 
You have just learned the first rule of washing shoes.

Dont stick them in the dryer. Let them air dry. Fuck shoes, it's summer. Just get a pair of 2 dollar flip flops.

or go to Walmart, Pretend you checking out shoes and rip some soles out of another pair.

Rule number 2. Never talk about fight club.
 
You can try not using the sole inserts, that works better for me with my street boots. I can't get the inserts from the store cause they don't make them in my size. Ether get some sandles, or ditch the inserts. The inserts are prolly what make the smell anyway.
 
You're fucking useless.


Ryuu: Your story sounds like something that would happen to me. The only advice I can offer is to buy some cheap sandals or flipflops and then burn your old, shitty shoes. Fortunately for me, I haven't had any problems with my feet yet. But just about everyother part of my body openly hates me :happysad:
 
The good will usually has shoes for $0.50. True they are someone else's shoes but if I was desperate and broke I would do it.
 
Wow, it sounds like your fucking up your feet pretty badly. Don't put them in the dryer, it makes them worse, you want to let them sit and air dry. My advice to you is to buy a pair of flip flops, they're like 3 bucks, and they'll help your feet out.

And by the title of this thread i couldn't resist to say this:

I'm so gellin I'm like MAgellin!:D
 
Stores can not sell used shoes or underwear. At least not in the US. There is a law that forbids this.

Those shoes are defects. Probably fell off of a truck and landed in the swamps.

This is what you do. Go to the worst part of town or a Mexican district. Look for one of those Mexican run 99 cent stores. I swear they got some decent shit in there.

I find shirts for like 2-5 bucks each. Not name brands, but just some basic polo shirts or some decent dress shirts you might find at target for 20-30 bucks.

I saw some shoes for like 5 bucks there. I purchased some fairly expensive nikes from mervyns for like 70 bucks. They still hurt my feet. I go to one of those crappy Shoe Pavilions and they sell name brands but their shoes stink. I purchased some real expensive penny loafers and they hurt my feet. Some of us just have fucked up arches. No matter how expensive shoes are, the inserts arent any better then a cheap 10 dollar pair you get at Shoes for Less.

As mentioned, Buy some sandles, Break those fuckers in with your hands for about a week. Wash them. Soften them and wear them and fuck shoes off.
 
King Goldfish said:
Stores can not sell used shoes or underwear. At least not in the US. There is a law that forbids this.
Bullshit. I've been to plenty of good will stores and thrift shops that sell used shoes. Your state may have a law against it or even just your city. But there is no federal law against selling used shoes. Used underware, there should be if there isn't.

As far as the sucky shoe issue, I'd agree with the flip flop idea depending on where you are. If you're in a nothern state, those will only last you another couple of months. I think the good will idea is a great one. Most of those shoes and clothes are only slightly used. Otherwise, there are outlet stores and stores that get items that didn't sell at a designer store and they sell things for dirt cheap with the tags still on. Good luck finding new shoes.

*Magnolia starts up a shoe fund*
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