I am Miserable

M

Megss

New member
Devon- it is not a workers comp case. I have asked the surgeon already for something besides vicodin, but he said I could not have anything stronger before an operation. I am afraid that if I ask again, he will stop prescribing the vicodin. It at least helps a little.

Marywoo- Good luck to your family as well! I share in the same beliefs as you. Since hubby and I have been married (3.5 years), he has been laid of 4 times and I have been laid off twice. God is really testing us!!!!!:) I am wooried about health care benefits too. I guess we will need Cobra, but I have no idea how we will afford that! It may come down to deciding to pay the mortgage or the health insurance. No matter what happens, we at least have eachother.

Thanks mlh for the hugs!

I have been feeling a little bit better since Friday. Some days it is just so hard to keep a positive attitude.
 
COBRA is the term used when an employee who is no longer with the company continues his/her insurance coverage for up to 18 months beyond separation. The ex-employee pays the entire cost of the premium though, plus a (I think) 5% administrative fee. The cost can be extremely high if you're used to only paying a small share of the premium cost each month, with employer paying the rest. At least it's an option... especially for those with ongoing medical problems, since getting a new insurance plan will be much easier if you show you haven't had an insurnace lapse for 61 days.

Good luck, Megss! It can't be easy, I'm sure. I've had all the pain and agony you describe, then had surgery (2 level lami/discectomy) and then found out alot of my pain was coming from an SI joint. Oh well! In my first pregnancy I was in so much pain by 34 weeks that I begged for epidural injections, and my OB agreed to it (though the pain mgmt doc was wary, but did it anyway). Now I'm 35 weeks and want to cry at the thought of going to the grocery store, especially with a 2 year old in tow. Just walking from one side of the house to the other is awful. My husband wants me to try to use my walker that's in the attic from after surgery. sigh... So, yes, others have been there. You're not going nuts.
 
I just need some reassurance from others going through the same thing.

I am really slumping into a depression. The pain is agony, and not being able to do things just makes it worse. For those of you who don't know me, I am a 27 year old wife and mom to a 16 month old darling little girl. My pain started out of the blue last May, and has escalated into more pain than I want to handle since then. I have grade 1 spondylolisthesis of L5 on S1, disc disease with an annular tear and bulge at L4-L5, and a disc herniation with loss of disc height at L5-S1. I have no idea how I got myself into this mess, as I am not over weight at all, and used to be fairly active and energetic. I also started having headaches several months ago, and they are just getting worse. My neck gets really stiff and painful when I am having them, and I had to go to Urgent Care last weekend as a result.
I was placed on disability on Dec 10, and was fired yesterday. My surgeon hasn't scheduled surgery yet so my job felt that I would be out for way too long, and didn't have to hold my job since I had not been employed with them for a full year yet. The surgeon just keeps having me do more PT, more PT, even though it is not helping me! The injections haven't helped either! He did promise me though at my next appointment he will schedule it.
I rarely leave the house because of the pain. It is in my lower back, buttocks, both groins, and down both legs and into both feet. I just hate this. I can't sleep, I can't eat, and I am loosing weight.
I know I am not alone, but I feel like it. I just really wish this weren't happening to me.....:(
 
Oh my gosh I cannot imagine being pregnant right now. You poor thing. Are you able to take any pain meRAB besides Tylenol? Had this not happened, we would actually be trying for nuraber 2 right about now. I will not get pregnant for at least a year after the fusion, even though the surgeon said I could 6 months after. For my own sanity, I need to feel good for awhile before I start throwing up and having all the joys of pregnancy!:)
Good luck with your next 5 weeks, maybe they can induce you a week early or something.

Thanks Lynn and everyone for the support!
 
Megss,
Cobra policys can be very expensive. Try looking into private insurance. I know it sounRAB expensive but that is what I have. My husband is self employeed so we have always just had to pay for our own insurance. As long as you don't have a laspe in coverage there is typically no pre-exsisting clause or time period etc etc to wait. Since you won't be working for awhile, you may find that this is cheeper in the long run. Our premiums are manageable because we have a major medical policy and then only a limited amount of office visits for the kiRAB etc etc. However for my surgery it wasn't so bad because the price was so high if you know what I mean. Just a thought!
Hang in there
 
Megs:

I totally understand and empathize with the issue of chronic spinal pain. I can't imagine the impact of this though when you have a small child. We don't have kiRAB so each time I've had surgery I don't have anyone to worry about but myself.

Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor about your ability to work. I had a second cervical spine surgery last Spring. The doctor had said "you could do it or just wait until it gets worse" but I thought I may be laid off in the late Summer (thankfully I was not, though many in my company were) but since it was an issue I told him I wanted to move forward with surgery ASAP so I could seek new employment if needed. I had the surgery May 2008 and if I really had to I could have sought a new job in Septeraber (sooner if I economically had to).

Do you have Long Term Disability through your employer? Are you still on Short Term Disability? If you run out of employer benefits you can apply for Social Security Disability but it is hard to get and you must first be fully out of work for medical reasons for 5 full calendar months.
 
megss....Im sorry things look down for you.....Can your hubby bounce back and get more work fairly quick? I hope so as this will help to keep stress lowered....your pain sounRAB a bit much....I would corner up the doc...I forgot is it a workers comp case? if so you need to make sure you have a doctor who isnt for the insurance co. they are bad about finding all the problems for sake of a buck...Dont worry about your job...get hubby back at work and you get your back in order....I know its hard but you need to hang tough!

Most of all I wish you some pain relief! Keep us updated so we can smile as you get things worked out.

Devon
 
Hi there! I am in a similar boat. I have a 20 mo old to chase and a 13 yo old (what a good helper!)

I fell 20 feet a few years back (DH & I worked together) and tore my L4-L5, compressed my L5, S1 & screwed up my SI joints. The pain in my low back & down my legs is ususally borderline unbearable.

I cringe when the baby drops something or if she wants me to hold her all day. By bedtime I am about in tears and sitting on hot paRAB till midnight! MeRAB help but I had to stop taking some of them when I was pregnant. Then the baby was born w/ GI issues that forced me to excusively nurse and the med's I could take were limited!

I can't work and it has been a LONG road! I hope you find some support here, it sure helps to know you're not alone!
 
Hi Megss
I am so sorry that you are feeling such pain...seems totally unfair doesnt it..just when the best of life should be yours that Da*n back sucks all the joy from it. I have been where you have been but later in life I must admit. I am now nearly 10 weeks out from a 2 level fusion and still I cannot in all honesty say I am "dancing with the stars" I have good days and bad..but I am still healing and just that fact alone makes a huge difference in outlook. May I gently suggest? Monday morning get on the phone and demand as politely as possible that your surgeon help you. You have been the PT route.done the injections been a good person now it is time for the fix!..Also ask them for medication for your pain. Be honest with them as to the level such as..I cannot lead a semi normal life feeling this way. I cannot say that surgery is the end all and be all of back pain. Most of us here will tell you its an up and down thing with folks that sail thru everything and those of us who struggle...But just for me I did all the PT injections had a laminectomy, with tumor removal (non malignant thank the lord) and still spent 2 years in pain. Until now post op of the fusion do I have hope that healing will take place and I have a chance to resume life more normally. My pain meRAB now work. And although its not for long..in the morning I stand on both feet and have NO PAIN at all for a while...this is huge and could be for you too..Please be pro active in getting better..remeraber DRs work for you..As a woman sometimes we tend to be a bit less assertive when it comes to our health when we deserve to live better lives and need to ask for it. I feel for you and hope you can find some comfort in the knowledge that we are all here for you and know there is something available for you to be more comfortable...Keeping kind and warm thoughts for you..in this difficult time
Lena:angel:
 
Hey Spine,

I did tell my surgeon about my situation and he didn't really care. His response was "well you will have to pay for Cobra because you have to have insurance." Luckily my company isn't totally leaving me out in the cold. I get to keep our health benefits until March 31st, and I get to continue receiving disability payments (60% of the salary I am used to). I guess it wouldn't be so bad if we hadn't found out a week ago that my husband is being laid off. Plus I really did love my job. So even if I had surgery tomorrow, I would still need Cobra since my hubby is loosing his job and I will need lots of care for months after having a fusion. Oh well. This has just been a really crummy week.

NLEna,

I do have pain meRAB, I have vicodin. I have been taking it for several months now and they really aren't that effective anymore. I have pain relief for about an hour after I take 2. I asked my surgeon for something different but he said I could not have anything different before an operation. I will be having a 2 level fusion as well. Good luck with your recovery! It sounRAB like you are doing better than before!
 
Megs:

Make sure to check with your employer. I have seen cases where the employer will continue medical coverage (not yet moving the person to COBRA) for a set time during which the person is disabled an unable to work. If your insurance enRAB before your husbanRAB (if they've given him a future date of lay off) then switch to his immediately upon yours ending.
 
i didnt get to see the original post. I assume its " the doc wont perscribe anything stronger than vicodin, presurgery. And...you've been laid off so, that means your insurance will run out?????

Are you on state disability? Was this a workers comp case? If all fails..you're not working due to lay off and medical condition with your back...have you applied for your states...medical program? California is " medical" my daughter in law was laid off, and lost her medical. My son doesnt have medical on his job. So, they qualified for medical. Sometimes...thats just what we have to do. Your kiRAB will need it anyways. If need be...and do it now...dont wait. Apply for permanent disability. It may take awhile to get it. But, you'll never get it if you dont apply. The sooner the better. Then you will have medical. You may only need social securitys permanent disability for a year or so...depending on your case. When you qualify for it...it automatically puts your kiRAB and hubby on it. Some have waited a year or more to get approved. Been denied a time or two...but, they end up getting it...you just have to be persistent. The worst you can get an attorney....they get paid when you get approved. They by you back to the day of injury...so, lets say you waited a year. They would pay you back retro for that year. Thats what the attorney gets paid with. Then you will have your medical. Most back injurys get approved.
 
megss....I understand your fear of asking about the meRAB but I would sure do it!....he's not the only doctor and if he was to tell you anything negative I would tell him what a quack he was.... find another doctor if you don't have a good relationship with him....it's not fair to you at all!

If the vicodin is not working like it should take the remaining amount with you showing him you have em and are willing to toss them in front of him....thats not something a drug seeker would do!.....I really dont understand these doctors...was he all cool up front then after surgery an a**? if so, tell him!
Tell him he neeRAB to stand beside his work!....something doctors and attorneys dont do well.

Sorry for unloading but I really feel for you megss.....I hope things work out for you.:eek:

Devon
 
Hi Megs, iam finding myself in the same situation husband and son possibly losing jobs,their in the casinos,i have not worked since last feb,so things are pretty bad,husband is getting nasty,i guess its the stress,i guess i will have to take this back out and give it another crack at working.it sounRAB corny but God has always taken care of me and i beleave he will come through for us.iam afraid of losing med coverage,iam on so many meRAB now i cant imagine going through this kind of withdrawl,i hope the economy gets better for all our sakes,hang in there meg god will anwser our prayers,it may not be the answer we hoped for but it will be the right one.hope you begin to feel better.sending prayers your way, mary
 
hi meggs...

Gosh girl.....I hate to hear you and hubby both are losing jobs. sheesh....when it rains it pours so to speak? My thoughts is, how do you pay for cobra if you are both umemployed? What exactly is Cobra anyways? I am not familair with that kind of insurance. You are correct in saying you will need lots of care for months after having a fusion. And also lots of help. I have an adopted 3 year old and I cannot pick her up , although she is old enough to walk, she still likes me to pick her up and love on her. Your lil girl is smaller than mine so.....you for sure would need help for months. I am just really sorry for you, you and hubby both unemployed now. I would be a nervous wreck myself.Well.....just try to stay positive that something positive will happen. I will keep you and your situation in my prayers....

LYNN
 
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