Yellowspotlight89
New member
There's a lot of action on the story that involves my main character doing and seeing things, and I feel like I'm using so many she's and her's that it'll become too noticeable. Is there a way to minimize this, or is it normal? Might placing them in different parts of the sentences, like in the middle sometimes instead of starting sentences with these words, help make it smoother? I'll show you an example of how frequently its required.
The crowd gasped as Violet’s body spiraled through the air. Her snowboard jerked over and she thunked into the snow. The motion dragged her across the plain and hurled sleet all around her. Her headgear clunked against her jaw and a surge of pain grinded into her cheekbone.
Is that a normal amount or is there some way to reduce this?
Any advice is welcome. Thank you!
The crowd gasped as Violet’s body spiraled through the air. Her snowboard jerked over and she thunked into the snow. The motion dragged her across the plain and hurled sleet all around her. Her headgear clunked against her jaw and a surge of pain grinded into her cheekbone.
Is that a normal amount or is there some way to reduce this?
Any advice is welcome. Thank you!