how pathatic

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want2bfree72

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I cant believe its only been just 6 hours since i posted on here saying how much i want to be clean. it had been 23 hours since i had my last vicoden and as soon as my legs started to really ache from not haviong any i knew i could not do this cold turkey. i just took two vicodens!! I feel like this is a hopeless battle for me. I have NO will power, thats why i could never wing myself off, i wanted that feel good feeling to much.
I just wish i could hurry and get thru the wd's of it. I know im going to have to have support to STAY clean but im so scared im never going to get there.
I just want to cry.
 
See my response to your first post. Cold Turkey is probably not the way you want to handle this. You need to taper gradually.
 
I am so sorry. My son went through the same thing with the vicodens. He's been fighting this battle for at least 9 yrs.. He's been on methadone under a doctors care and is doing alot better now. They are slowly weaning him off of the methadone now.
I also have a daughter doing the same thing only she isn't doing well at all.
I will say a prayer for you that you can get off of this stuff. I am so sorry.

Linda
 
The wd's are not fun. However, you can beat it if you set your mind to it. Do you have enough of your prescription to do a taper or do you just have a small amount?

There are 2 ways you can go with this......get rid of the pills so that there are no more to take and you are forced to get clean OR taper down as soon as you can.

I hope that you find the way that is best for you. You CAN do it!
 
Missuray, thank you so much for your prayers. You have no idea how much that means. I am also very sorry that you are living w the same thing, i have learned that whether you are the one w the addiction or not, if you have someone close to you w an addiction YOU are also living w it. I just wish i could snap my fingers and it would be a yr from now, but then again maybe i really do need to remeraber everyday of this. ...sigh...
 
magpie1970, thank you for your support. I do not have any pills in my possion i do NOT have any will power to try to taper down. God knows i wish i did, so the only way i can taper down is to go to a friend and get some whenever i absouletly need them. I did take the two last night because i couldnt handle the aching in my legs from wd's. I really hate this! but thank you again for your support
 
My situation is a little different but it still has the same end result. I have chronic back pain and have been taking 40-60mg oxy and a 25mg fentayl patch. I ended up getting the flu this week and couldn't keep anything down. I noticed that my symptoms were worse then what my daughters had and it scared the bejesus out of me. So, I have not replaced my patch since Monday and I have not taking any pills for 5 days. I am feeling more normal although still a little weak from both the flu and detox. I know for me at some point I will have to use something on occasion but for my mental health I can not go back to where I was. I still have 50 5mg oxys in the house and another script ready on Monday but I really have no desire to ever get physically dependent again. I am scared. My back is killing me and I am so uncomfortable but I am hoping with time I can handle more and more pain and only use when absoluetly necessary. I have two small children and do not want to be addicted. If your pain is manageable or if your using for the high, I would suggest biting the bullet and getting over the worse of it. It sucks and its uncomfortable but the delayed and prolonged withdrawal from stepping down is much worse ( I know through quitting smoking -yes, I know does not even touch the level of discomfort but for me CT is the best route.) Find what works best for you and do it. YOur in my thoughts
 
hi scoenen
i hope this finRAB you in good health and where you want to be! I have to say i wish i had, had the strength you have when it came to just going ct. I would have thought that the wd"s would have been horrable since you had been taking such strong meRAB! Its always so encouraging to know someone who relates to your situation has gotten over the rough part...well atleast the wd's staying clean esp when in pain is the hardest part of it all i honestly believe! I have been doing alot better, i wish i could say i have not taken a single pill but truth is i have here and there....but im not beating myself up over it like i have. i am doing the best i can at the moment im in!~ and its a hell of alot better then where i was a month ago!
Thank you for sharing your story w me. I barely post anymore but i do still come and read the posts it just continues to give me strength. im sending you best wishes!
 
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