How can I survive a brutal work environment while keeping my sanity?

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imported_obamamama

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do anyone of those people harassing you sign your paycheck? if not then feel free to speak up and defend yourself it's your right as a human being. if you answered yes then why is it you feel that you can't find another job-your scared-but it's something you must do-keep looking and when you finally do find a job then you will have great satisfaction in telling them they s**k as human beings. in the meantime don't take it personally it's their problem and their laying into you. so keep cashing in those paychecks and focus on those who you love and those who love you. next time just simply say please don't talk to me that way. I'm not your child/pet which ever is best for you.
 
I feel so stupid that I just don't "get" or understand at all how office politics work. I guess I'm too rational and logical a person to think on a level that involves kissing up to people (if this is all that is involved in office politics??)

I was mistreated in an office (and in an open space to boot), and was harrassed constantly and terribly. I crumpled in humiliation -- in front of all to see. Now, I've gained some support, but just some. I'm still wounded and upset. I feel as if I am going through post-traumatic stress disorder (for all to see again). I do feel shell shocked.

So, every so often my "bad" side shows itself. I get grumpy and start showing signs of post-traumatic stress disorder (I lash out by saying things that I know I should not, but I've been stripped of my dignity there for a paycheck to survive.)

My credibility and my dignity have been robbed from me. Even if I don't have good enough credentials to go on, I should not have been treated this way. Anyhow, I am still employed as of today.

1) How do I learn how office politics "work"?
2) How can I muster up my confidence again when I'm constantly beaten down?
3) How can I maintain my composure and dignity along with my sanity too?

I feel like I'm despised by others
 
1) if the bosses dont keep people off the backs of those who can take it the least, then spend more time protecting yourself and less time working

2) dont be afraid to seek another job....but dont be surprised if this repeats itself at the new workplace

3) find some way to strengthen your personality. i used to live in boston.....all the new people in twon couldnt stand ho 'tough' a town it was

I knew people who were in my uion who i would say 'hi' to every day and would not say 'hi' back

when they wouldnt say 'hi' back, I would swear at them ('screw u' is the nice way of saying what I said).

imagine you see a guy one to ten times a day and much of the time he says 'hi' and if you dont say 'hi' back, he will start cussing you out for a second or two......

somehow it is easier to just say 'hi' to me than to have me cuss you out several times per day

My attitude is simply...I aint going nowhere...i am trying to be 'nice' and if you have a problem with that, that is your problem

The workplace is not a place of pleasure. it is a place to get work done and get paid

it is stressful for everyone....we need to know sometimes that those we work with are tough mentally....we have little respect for those who are emotionally weak since it takes much emotional strength to even show up everyday when EVERYONE would rather be elsewhere

The best way to make a better workplace is to make your own workplace

the more you mes with your colleagues, the more they will respect you or at least leave you alone

and in Boston, I used to have a saying, "if you cannot mess with your frineds, who can you mes with?"

it may be that those who give you a hard time only do so cuz they think you can take it unlike so many others who just fall apart with a simple insult that meant to put you down, but mean in jest

the workplace is not a place of comfort ( i may be repeating myself for emphasis).....it is a place to do business...too much stress is not good, but it should not be a place where to much time is spent just saying 'hi' to everyone

this is the life of work not just for men, but for women, too. the most abusive person I ever worked with was an older woman and i put her in her place verbally more times than I can count (she used to call me the Philadelphia lawyer cuz i wouldn't take crap from no one when i wasnt in the mood

she made my life misery for years and my ex wife would add to that misery....

that woman would give me a hard time all day and my ex wife would give me a hard time all night (screaming at me at the top of her lungs in at 2 am saying she wanted a divorce -she got it)

you definitely need some verbal self defense skills


best rule of verbal self d is to depersonalize statements so that they do not sting YOU...divert the attack...dont let it get to you by pushing it onto everyone

someone says i am a butthole....I say, I have heard that before...not very original......are you sure you arent looking in the mirror or smelling yourself

repeat after me.....F*** You very much (should be said to sound like thank you very much)....it confuses people....only say this when you are really mad...the best insults leave the person you wish to insult confuised and others trying to figure out what you said
 
do anyone of those people harassing you sign your paycheck? if not then feel free to speak up and defend yourself it's your right as a human being. if you answered yes then why is it you feel that you can't find another job-your scared-but it's something you must do-keep looking and when you finally do find a job then you will have great satisfaction in telling them they s**k as human beings. in the meantime don't take it personally it's their problem and their laying into you. so keep cashing in those paychecks and focus on those who you love and those who love you. next time just simply say please don't talk to me that way. I'm not your child/pet which ever is best for you.
 
Check in with the company's Human Resources office and see if you can get some help there. That's what they're there for. If that doesn't help, you may be better off looking for other employment. I've worked in bad environments before, and in my opinion, it's not worth all the effort and aggravation and humiliation you have to go through to try to correct a problem, or a number of issues, that are out of your control. If you can't get cooperation from the other people involved that need to take part in correcting the situation, you end up just spinning your wheels... at least that's been my experience. No one should have to put up with bad treatment just to collect a paycheck! If the problem is severe enough that you feel you need to take it to the Labor Board, that may be an option worth looking into as well. I never went that far, so I don't know how helpful or not they really are, but they're supposed to be there to help in all kinds of labor-related issues. I'm sorry you are having to go through this. I know what it feels like. Just know that it's not a reflection on you at all, but on those who are treating you with disrespect. Try to stay strong and focused on resolving the issue rather than allowing yourself to crumble under the pressure of it. No job is worth your sanity and personal well-being. It's better to move on if you can, but it would also be great if you could do something to change the way things are being done right now. You may not be the only person being targeted. A change in the so-called "politics" may improve a whole lot more than just your own situation. Go for it!
 
Everyone I know is in the same situtation as you are. It is not unique. It is called the Corporate World. Unless you are a VP, just get used to it because it will never change.
 
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