Getting those "bad thoughts" out of your head

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silvercity09

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A few years ago I suffered from panic attacks and with help of CBT they went away. Everything was going fine until last year when I started experiencing bad acid reflux. This led to a dramatic weight loss and severe anxiety and I guess mild depression. The weight loss has caused me self esteem issues and anxiety...not panic attacks...I haven't had one of those but I get the feeling of shaking inside. Ativan seems to help some..I don't do well with anti depressants so after trying two of them for a few weeks I decided to stop and try to do this on my own. The problem I have is dealing with this constant thought that is in my head that just won't go away...it's basically my brain telling myself "I don't want to live anymore, I want to die". I hate this thought and I shrug it away but it keeps coming back. Besides the health issue I'm dealing with I am actually a very lucky person...I have a great family, great frienRAB, job, no financial difficulties etc....still I don't know why I keep thinking dark thoughts. I am going back to my therapist this week and I will mention it to her but maybe you guys can help....is it just me or are there others out there with similar thoughts...what do you do? I can't believe a health issue such as acid reflux is so horrible that it makes me feel like crap every single day....I just don't know what else to do.

P.S. Thought just popped into my head and I feel like crying...arghhhhhhhhhhhh I hate feeling like this. I want to be healthy...PLEASE GOD LET THIS ACID REFLUX GO AWAY!!!
 
Are you taking anything for your acid reflux? Talk to your doctor about nexium, it works wonders.

Did you go off the antidepressants by yourself or with the help of your therapist? Maybe stopping it without proper weaning has caused the thoughts? I have read that it happens.
 
It's been months since I've taken anti depressants....I noticed I had these thoughts even before I started taking them. There are days where I feel fine (not too much anxiety) and I'm laughing having a good time with frienRAB etc...but then there are days like today where I feel horrible and I just want to cry. I'm never constant with my emotions and I hate it...is this what depression feels like or is it just me. I'm trying my best not to let this thing beat me but some days I feel useless.
 
Actually one of the key features of depression is 2 weeks of sustained low mood. Pretty sure that doesn't count Bi-Polar though...

I'm surprised you gave up on antidepressants after only 2 weeks!?! They take atleast 2 weeks to even begin to work, you really should try one for atleast 2 months and then see how you feel.

See your doctor, because the longer you try and do it on your own the longer it will take to get better ( anyway), I tried it on my own for a year and it took alot more to get myself out of the hole I dug during that year. I also believe that most people will face depression at some point in their life, if you don't deal with what's causing it and just try to sweep it under the rug, it will come back again and again.
 
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