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Funny jokes to say for a Stand up comedy act?
- Thread starter Adam H
- Start date
for the start come out and say your name and then say don't worry ive never heard of you either
talk about topical thing like things in the news at the moment you could use a micheal jackson joke like micheal jackson jokes a good one is: what is the difference between micheal jackson and jade goody? about 3 months or: why did micheal jackson die at 1.05am?
because thats when big hand totches little hand.
Try putting on an accent so people think your scottish or something for your first few jokes and then say oh sod it i cant keep it up and go back to your normal voice
Hope i helped Good Luck =)
talk about topical thing like things in the news at the moment you could use a micheal jackson joke like micheal jackson jokes a good one is: what is the difference between micheal jackson and jade goody? about 3 months or: why did micheal jackson die at 1.05am?
because thats when big hand totches little hand.
Try putting on an accent so people think your scottish or something for your first few jokes and then say oh sod it i cant keep it up and go back to your normal voice
Hope i helped Good Luck =)
Fred C Dobbs
New member
Observations are an easy way to start.
For example: Why is it that you never see any baby pigeons?..and then do 5 minutes about pigeons.
Just take your pad, laptop, whatever, and walk around and write down things that don't make sense..or just plain weird. (Observe people at a mall..and start writing, commenting).
Watch Seinfeld...of course you need to have the talent to make and perform youur observations wittily (real word?).
Good luck.
For example: Why is it that you never see any baby pigeons?..and then do 5 minutes about pigeons.
Just take your pad, laptop, whatever, and walk around and write down things that don't make sense..or just plain weird. (Observe people at a mall..and start writing, commenting).
Watch Seinfeld...of course you need to have the talent to make and perform youur observations wittily (real word?).
Good luck.
Old man walks in to a bar - barman get me a tequila shot - barman gets him a tequila, he downs it then turns to three men drinking beer in the corner and says - oii you boy - I like to eat yo mama, yeah - man shakes his head carries on drinking beer
Turns to barman - tequila - barman pours him another - downs it, slams the glass on the table, turns to the second man - you, yeah you, I do yo mama from behind like a crazeee animal - man turns away and carries on drinking his beer
Tequila!!! - barman says sir I think you should leave - Tequila!!!! - barman gives him another - knocks it back, turns to the third man and says young man I can make yo mama squeal like a pig on wheels - three men put down their beers, turn and walk towards the man...
Come on dad, time to get you home now says the first.
Turns to barman - tequila - barman pours him another - downs it, slams the glass on the table, turns to the second man - you, yeah you, I do yo mama from behind like a crazeee animal - man turns away and carries on drinking his beer
Tequila!!! - barman says sir I think you should leave - Tequila!!!! - barman gives him another - knocks it back, turns to the third man and says young man I can make yo mama squeal like a pig on wheels - three men put down their beers, turn and walk towards the man...
Come on dad, time to get you home now says the first.