Feb 20, 2006

D

Destiny K

New member
Tommorow is the birthday of one of my favorite people.

A little girl I used to raise turns 6. I'd call her, if her mother wouldn't use her as a trap to get me to return to her wicked ways.

The little girl isn't my blood, but she was a part of my life for quite a while. I was just 16, and I took her mother and her on as a family. I potty-trained her, I put her to bed, and I was the one who was there for her whenever she needed me.
Sometimes I tell myself she's worth the pain her mother brings me, but in the end my logical mind tells me otherwise. It's a shitty feeling to know what you're missing out on when it comes to a situation like this. I guess I can send her my best wishes, and be with her in spirit, but getting close to her and being there for her isn't an option if I know what's best for me. Her father is returning soon anyways, so it's best i get out of the picture.

It's just one of those not-so-easy things you've gotta do I guess.

Counting Crows - Round Here

"Round here, she's always on my mind."

The song may mean something else to most, but it reminds me of her.
 
Well, let me be the first to wish "one of your favorite people" a happy birthday and many more, from what I gather from the situation, it's very sad, I had a cousen who would not let my great aunt see her grand children because she was a Massage Therapist, some how it was against her religion... Not being able to see a love one hurts deep down, and I hope that somehow, whatever happens, it all turns out for the good.;)
 
Is the mother just as horrible to the daughter as she is to you? If she is the girl probably needs someone to be a better role model of the way people should be. Is there any way you could take the girl out just the two of you? That way there would be minimal contact with the mother, and you would still get to hang out with the daughter on her birthday.
 
i feel your pain, havok, and you have my best wishes. i haven't seen my daughter's birthday in 9 years because of her mother's bullshit.

send her a card, she'll love it. my best to you and her bro.
 
The mother isn't terrible to her daughter. Some of her beliefs about raising a child might not equal mine, but there's plenty of love between the two. And her mother hasn't been too terrible to me in the past few months, but it's probably because I haven't seen her or heard from her. ;)

I thought about hanging out with her by ourselves, but I'm not sure if her mom would dig that. I've asked for that in the past, and it only happened one time. Our relationship was alot different back then too. It hasn't exactly improved. I haven't even called this chick in quite a while. Once I call her, it sets off a chain reaction of events from hell, and I really don't feel up to dealing with it emotionally.

I'm between a rock and a hard place, like always.
 
If it doesn't feel good, to bring up a whole can of worms, for your sake then, I would say for the most part, don't do it right now.
You need to get stable emotionally to be able to handle it.
All you can do right NOW is be with her in spirit and wish her the best, and hope that things even out so that you can once again see her, and make up for it, and explain to her why you couldn't wish her the best birthday.

That's personally what I would do.
I hope you choose the best decision for you.
 
Hey man I had the same problome with my lil cuz. I raised her when she was lil and all that too. But then the state gave her back to her pathatic excuse of a mom. Well her mom hates the hell out of me. Well every time I came over I got these looks like im the worst roll model. Dont get me wrong Im not the best but compared to her, Hitler would make a better parent. So despite all the problomes I face by seeing her and all that gas wasted to drive for 45 minutes just to see her. It helps her and she enjoys every minute of it. So if she has a hard time were she lives its best to just deal with it and give her that short time of a having fun and enjoying life.

Well man I send my best wishes for many B-days to come. I hope everything works out in the end try just going to a different room with her.
 
I appreciate the kind words people. It's just another thing I'll have to battle with myself about. I still have an entire day, so we'll see.

Encouragement and positive feedback rules.:thumbsup:
 
Ok man hey if you need some advice you know were to find us everone here has some kind of problome like that.

Well good luck and Tostig had a good idea get her a card and I normally buy like the cutest damn thing I can find.
 
I'm so broke right now I can't even afford to buy cigarettes! (and obviously not a card)

Of course I could just draw her something. It's been a while since I busted out with the old Sketchpad.

I still think I might have to give myself some more time before I even bother with her and her mother. Meh put me in the right direction. Then we'll see what I can do after I'm ready to handle the situation properly.

Patience is a virtue.
 
Hey man Im great at ideas with no money just take a look at my name. Well here is a few things you can do with no money.

1. like you said draw a pic kids love them.
2. give her something you have that she will like kinda cheap but it works.
3. Just hang out with her and suprise her by just popin over with a hug.
4. get her some candy like a cheap bag of MnM's and make a card.
5. Tell her she can get a piggy back ride for her B-day kids love them.

No matter what you do just her seein you will be the best man so just have fun and forget about her mom let that shit run off your back.
 
Ha, I'm the master of gifts man. Money isn't really a problem once I actually start using my head. Creativity just needs a little boost before it starts flowing properly.
 
Dude you sound like my long lost bro if your anything like me you will have no trouble at all man. But good luck and have a great time.
 
I'm probably going to call this evening to wish her a "Happy Birthday".

I spoke with her mother a little bit about the situation, and she claims she doesn't want to cause me any grief. I'm still weary about jumping back into anything, especially when it's been so long since I've seen the girl.

We'll see how things progress.:thumbsup:
 
Back
Top