English : Native English speaker edit my poem please?

L

Ladyhawk

New member
I have a hard time to follow your thoughts. I suggest that while you are writing you should sit with someone who is born speaking English, they can help you find the right words as you are using them. I think maybe you have chosen some wrong words and it has changed your intention, because it doesn't make much sense. Please keep trying and do keep writing. I am very glad to see someone try to write a poem in a language not their native one. I admire your aspirations.
 
I wake up usually once a night around 4AM to go to the bathroom and I always think that the person or the thing I think of at the time I wake up for bathroom is most important to me at that my life time.

The person occupies my head most at that my life time.

Sometimes it is someone who bothers me.
Sometimes someone I like or love.
Sometimes not a person, but something to do.
Sometimes my brother or friends.

At 4AM today,
I thought of you.
 
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