I usually don't ask these kinds of questions but I don't really feel like telling one of my friends just for the sake of not making things awarkard. But anyone here's the situation. One of my best guy friends and I have completely drifted apart since last year. I can't really pin point the exact time but slowly things just started changing. He started becoming more into partying and himself than those around him. We used to hang out all the time and have a good time. But then things just started going down hill. He never really seemed to listen to any sort of problem I had. Like somehow he would always turn it to him, or just be really short about it and not really care. After that I kinda just shut him out of telling him anything personal anymore knowing that he would just act in a way that I didn't think was very friend like. He had been having troubles with school and I was there for him with that, I helped him in everyway that I could. He trouble with one of his good friends that was in the military, I helped him through that. He knew if he had a problem I was there for him. Yet what did I get in return nothing. I pretty much felt like he was using me, just as his emotional punching bag or something. Then he would pretty much just finally decide to text back when he needed to know something about school.
This was/is another big issue. He NEVER responds to texts. If any of us text him we won't hear back from him for days. Which is total bogus because everybody knows he always has his phone on him. However if we don't respond to his messages I get the third degree and tells everyone of my wrong doing. This past summer I had enough of it and just didn't want to deal with it anymore. So I just shut him and stopped talking to him. He texted me three times within a month and half. And the first two were about a party and the other was sent to another person. The sad part was during those two and a half months I felt a weight lifted of my shoulders. Like I didn't have to worry about meeting his guidelines as a friend or trying to do what he wanted. While it sucked because we have the same friends and hanging out made things difficult it was fine. However when it came down to it I was the one that got bitched out. I was the one that did something wrong. We ended up going for coffee to talk about the whole situation and I never really was able to say what I really wanted. He is one of those guys that if you say something bad about him he will get really defensive and deny it. And that's pretty much exactly what happened. I tried to explain all the things I was upset about and he just seemed to be able to turn it around as if everything that happened was my fault. But I just shrugged it off becasue you know he was my best friend.
Things went back to normal after that, but then this fall school started up and things just started to be happening over again. And tonight was kinda the breaking point. I made a comment about how never texts back and called him shady. And he got all defensive told me he probably wouldn't text me back now because he's so shady and that's it. Of course the empathetic person I am was pissed but then apolgized for saying such harsh words. I said this whole long spheel of how I just miss how things used to be and bada bada bada and I'm sorry. And what does he say? Nothing and just signs off.
I'm just confused. I don't know what to do anymore. Do I AGAIN try to work this out and just shrug it off. Or do I just stop being friends with one of my best friends?
This was/is another big issue. He NEVER responds to texts. If any of us text him we won't hear back from him for days. Which is total bogus because everybody knows he always has his phone on him. However if we don't respond to his messages I get the third degree and tells everyone of my wrong doing. This past summer I had enough of it and just didn't want to deal with it anymore. So I just shut him and stopped talking to him. He texted me three times within a month and half. And the first two were about a party and the other was sent to another person. The sad part was during those two and a half months I felt a weight lifted of my shoulders. Like I didn't have to worry about meeting his guidelines as a friend or trying to do what he wanted. While it sucked because we have the same friends and hanging out made things difficult it was fine. However when it came down to it I was the one that got bitched out. I was the one that did something wrong. We ended up going for coffee to talk about the whole situation and I never really was able to say what I really wanted. He is one of those guys that if you say something bad about him he will get really defensive and deny it. And that's pretty much exactly what happened. I tried to explain all the things I was upset about and he just seemed to be able to turn it around as if everything that happened was my fault. But I just shrugged it off becasue you know he was my best friend.
Things went back to normal after that, but then this fall school started up and things just started to be happening over again. And tonight was kinda the breaking point. I made a comment about how never texts back and called him shady. And he got all defensive told me he probably wouldn't text me back now because he's so shady and that's it. Of course the empathetic person I am was pissed but then apolgized for saying such harsh words. I said this whole long spheel of how I just miss how things used to be and bada bada bada and I'm sorry. And what does he say? Nothing and just signs off.
I'm just confused. I don't know what to do anymore. Do I AGAIN try to work this out and just shrug it off. Or do I just stop being friends with one of my best friends?