Xplosion23
New member
This is one of the most brutal, disturbing scenes in my horror novel. The entire story is not this grotesque, but this particular part was meant to disgust the reader more so than the previous chapters. Could you please tell me if you find it frightening and grotesque, and also do you find it to be well writen? I would like to inform you as well that no this is not happening in reality. It is a dream in the mind of a scitzophrenic. Warning: This extract is not for the queasy.
In the midst of the flames was a woman, strapped between two trees. Barbed wire was tied around her wrists and ankles, ripping away skin so deeply that bone was visible. The wire ran from her arms and legs to the two trees where it wrapped around the bark and cut into the wood. Not only were her wrists lacerated, but the tips of her fingers had been ripped away, as if she had torn them off with pliers. She wore a white dress, stained red with blood, and her mangled and singed brown hair draped over her left shoulder, darkening half of her face.
As Jacob raised his eyes away from the ground he turned towards the woman. His face filled with disgust at the sight. He wanted to look away, he had to look away, but he couldn’t. His eyes stayed fixated on the revolting image. She was smiling at him, even through all of her pain she was smiling. In fact, it was as if she felt no pain… no pain at all. She was unhindered by her wounds, oblivious to them.
“I told you he wasn’t dead, I told you! He’s going to take me away now! Just as soon as he comes. He’ll be here soon.” The flames lapped at her face as she spoke, singing her skin, but she continued to smile. The smell of burning flesh filled the air, replacing that of decomposition.
Jacob was too stunned to speak. His mouth was dry and his tongue was limp. The heat from the fire began to cause sweats down his back and forehead. The only movement he could make was the tremble of fear that shook his body.
Suddenly there was an abrupt crack and the woman shot her chest forward as she gasped for air. “Yes! He comes, he comes! He’s almost here!” She said. Her breathing was labored and with every breath she took she squirmed with pain. Another crack. Then another. Now silence. She raised her head and smiled at Jacob. “It’s time.”
As she said this her chest burst open and the head of the demon busted through her broken ribs, showering Jacob with flecks of blood and pieces of bone. As it emerged it let out an ear splitting shriek and began to claw its boney hands through the narrow opening it had made, cracking ribs as it muscled its way through. Then, with a swift thrust of its hands, it ripped the opening of her chest wider until it tore upwards through the neck and cleaved her jaw in half. Downwards he had ripped her apart to her belly button, spilling out entrails over her dress. It let out another cry before pushing his arm through her chest and tearing his knee violently out of her body, further cleaving her in half.
The woman watched as the demon vehemently tore through her body. She cringed with pain as it climbed out of her, ripping her in half. She wanted to scream, but she couldn’t as her mouth had been torn apart. The demon’s barbed wired skin shredded her flesh as it caught on her skin and ripped it away. With each move it made, its coiled barbs would tear more and more flesh out of her.
She should be dead! Jacob thought as he watched in horror. How in the hell isn’t she dead? Yet her eyes darted back and forth, drifting from Jacob to the demon then back to Jacob.
The fiend finally clawed his way through the woman, and collapsed onto the floor at her feet with a hard thud. As the demon fell, the woman’s wrists, which were not much more than bone now, snapped at the point of the barbed wire lacerations, and she crumpled to the ground too, sparking flames into the air. The barbed wire that was tied to her swung back towards the tree bouncing the hands off of the wood, where they hung in place swinging in circles as the barbed wire twisted.
In the midst of the flames was a woman, strapped between two trees. Barbed wire was tied around her wrists and ankles, ripping away skin so deeply that bone was visible. The wire ran from her arms and legs to the two trees where it wrapped around the bark and cut into the wood. Not only were her wrists lacerated, but the tips of her fingers had been ripped away, as if she had torn them off with pliers. She wore a white dress, stained red with blood, and her mangled and singed brown hair draped over her left shoulder, darkening half of her face.
As Jacob raised his eyes away from the ground he turned towards the woman. His face filled with disgust at the sight. He wanted to look away, he had to look away, but he couldn’t. His eyes stayed fixated on the revolting image. She was smiling at him, even through all of her pain she was smiling. In fact, it was as if she felt no pain… no pain at all. She was unhindered by her wounds, oblivious to them.
“I told you he wasn’t dead, I told you! He’s going to take me away now! Just as soon as he comes. He’ll be here soon.” The flames lapped at her face as she spoke, singing her skin, but she continued to smile. The smell of burning flesh filled the air, replacing that of decomposition.
Jacob was too stunned to speak. His mouth was dry and his tongue was limp. The heat from the fire began to cause sweats down his back and forehead. The only movement he could make was the tremble of fear that shook his body.
Suddenly there was an abrupt crack and the woman shot her chest forward as she gasped for air. “Yes! He comes, he comes! He’s almost here!” She said. Her breathing was labored and with every breath she took she squirmed with pain. Another crack. Then another. Now silence. She raised her head and smiled at Jacob. “It’s time.”
As she said this her chest burst open and the head of the demon busted through her broken ribs, showering Jacob with flecks of blood and pieces of bone. As it emerged it let out an ear splitting shriek and began to claw its boney hands through the narrow opening it had made, cracking ribs as it muscled its way through. Then, with a swift thrust of its hands, it ripped the opening of her chest wider until it tore upwards through the neck and cleaved her jaw in half. Downwards he had ripped her apart to her belly button, spilling out entrails over her dress. It let out another cry before pushing his arm through her chest and tearing his knee violently out of her body, further cleaving her in half.
The woman watched as the demon vehemently tore through her body. She cringed with pain as it climbed out of her, ripping her in half. She wanted to scream, but she couldn’t as her mouth had been torn apart. The demon’s barbed wired skin shredded her flesh as it caught on her skin and ripped it away. With each move it made, its coiled barbs would tear more and more flesh out of her.
She should be dead! Jacob thought as he watched in horror. How in the hell isn’t she dead? Yet her eyes darted back and forth, drifting from Jacob to the demon then back to Jacob.
The fiend finally clawed his way through the woman, and collapsed onto the floor at her feet with a hard thud. As the demon fell, the woman’s wrists, which were not much more than bone now, snapped at the point of the barbed wire lacerations, and she crumpled to the ground too, sparking flames into the air. The barbed wire that was tied to her swung back towards the tree bouncing the hands off of the wood, where they hung in place swinging in circles as the barbed wire twisted.