Mrs. Smith
New member
I have three children,an 18 year old,a 12 year old and an 8 year old. My son who's 18,almost 19,still lives in the house with his step-dad and I. He's graduated high school and claims to be job searching but I have yet to hear him say he has an interview. He is my son and I do love him so I've been letting him stay but not without conflict.
He treats my home like it's his own personal apartment. Friends and "friends" come in and out all times. When my husband and/or I say anything,he gets mad. Well we have a 12 & 8 year old in the house and don't want them exposed to all of his actions.
Last night he was keeping up a lot of noise with friends that he had come through the window. I went in there and told them they needed to leave and that he needed to keep the noise down because his brother & sister had school in the morning. He started yelling and cursing me out as he approached me in a threatening way. Basically he was mad I was shutting down his little party. I told him to watch his mouth and he yelled even more which made my husband get up. He walked in on him just about having me cornered and he pushed him back and they got into it,not a lot but enough to make my son kick out all of his friends and keep himself locked in his room. This morning(after he figured his step son had calmed down) my husband went in there to talk. My son started up the same way as last night. Honestly,I'm tired of how he gets upset when we say anything to him he doesn't like. So I went in there and took his car keys(I bought the car so he had a way to high school and could drop off his brother and sister--it's still in my name and I pay for the upkeep,gas and so forth) and grounded him. He started saying that he was a grown man and that even though I was his Mom I couldn't take his keys and ground him. I told him my house,my car,my rules and if he didn't want it to happen he needed to find his own place and go live there.
I'm really to the point where I think we should kick him out. But he's my oldest and I have this...I just don't want anything bad to happen to him but if he's getting to live here for free and do what he wants then we're hurting him right? Do you think I was wrong to take the keys and ground him? Do you think we need to give him a 30 day notice so he can at least try to find a job in that amount of time? If he does get a job should we let him stay in our home a little longer if he chooses(as long as he follows the rules)?
He treats my home like it's his own personal apartment. Friends and "friends" come in and out all times. When my husband and/or I say anything,he gets mad. Well we have a 12 & 8 year old in the house and don't want them exposed to all of his actions.
Last night he was keeping up a lot of noise with friends that he had come through the window. I went in there and told them they needed to leave and that he needed to keep the noise down because his brother & sister had school in the morning. He started yelling and cursing me out as he approached me in a threatening way. Basically he was mad I was shutting down his little party. I told him to watch his mouth and he yelled even more which made my husband get up. He walked in on him just about having me cornered and he pushed him back and they got into it,not a lot but enough to make my son kick out all of his friends and keep himself locked in his room. This morning(after he figured his step son had calmed down) my husband went in there to talk. My son started up the same way as last night. Honestly,I'm tired of how he gets upset when we say anything to him he doesn't like. So I went in there and took his car keys(I bought the car so he had a way to high school and could drop off his brother and sister--it's still in my name and I pay for the upkeep,gas and so forth) and grounded him. He started saying that he was a grown man and that even though I was his Mom I couldn't take his keys and ground him. I told him my house,my car,my rules and if he didn't want it to happen he needed to find his own place and go live there.
I'm really to the point where I think we should kick him out. But he's my oldest and I have this...I just don't want anything bad to happen to him but if he's getting to live here for free and do what he wants then we're hurting him right? Do you think I was wrong to take the keys and ground him? Do you think we need to give him a 30 day notice so he can at least try to find a job in that amount of time? If he does get a job should we let him stay in our home a little longer if he chooses(as long as he follows the rules)?