depression, highs, back and forth, poetry, help?!?

J

Janey J

New member
why is my mid wavering back and forth?
lowest of all lows, to high in cool-crisp air?
why do i get sudden boughts of sadness, then suddenly fly upwards?
the blue thoughts hurt, i want to curl up in a ball and cry an ocean and float....then the yellow thoughts come and burn it away. Its me, I'm shooting up and up and up the wind burns my face. then suddenly in the blue again....i was diagnosed with clinical depression, i want to stay in the high-up-happy place but i doesnt make any sense.... am i bipolar? what is going on.... can i be a kid for once please? i want to cut again... i used to but now i'm really tempted again... help? what is this?
 
For one thing being Bi Polar is hard to diagnose because MANY people experience highs and lows. Depression is even harder, people want to feel like they need help and I know you're probably thinking Wtf why would I want to be like this or why would i want to need help. You can go to many or one dr. and they'll all "treat" you because they want the money. This is where the will needs to come in, people can only help themselves as much as they allow themselves to be helped. If it doesn't work its because they gave up. You can't give up, whenever you feel sad or depressed don't let it take over you. You're emotions are not fully in charge of yourself. Yes, they are strong, but you still choose what to do about it. Don't let your anger build up either, if you're angry let it out. If someone hurt you let them know. Talk it out, express it someway. All of your emotions are just there inside of you let them out. If you like to write poetry leave it at that; words on paper, you can write about the darkest things you want but don't act them out in real life. If poetry isn't enough add in something else. Try dancing or singing, get a natural high it's a really good feeling. Really look at yourself and find out who you are, your scars don't define you. I hope you start to truly live and be happy just to be alive :)
 
me too :(
i think its bipolar.
but for me its different. when im happy im happy bubbluely and stuff. but when im sad i think of death :( && its scary cuz i dont wanna die. and i dont talk to my friends cuz idk,.its all in my headd :(
 
Keep in mind: no cutting. you don't wantto be judged for the rest of your life for something that could go away.

Are you bipolar? It could be possible, but highly unlikely. Unstable, or maybe just puberty creating mood swings? Probably.

I know we share the depression, (to the extents i do not know) and i also know i, like you, i randomly switch moods to anything. It could be linked to the Depression you mentioned, as maybe it is a chemical imbalance.

Cutting is never the answer.
 
The ocean waves back and forth..
The air is blessed by the hurt of the living..
Boredom is the link to all evil..
loneliness, hopeless and undesired.
feeling fire in your rage but who will free you from your cage..

Help me.. save me please..
raise me from my knees..

I dont want to cry..
i dont want to die..

want to live my life..as intended to..
want to live to survive..cant you see im blue..

i believed in god..who gave me living blood..
thats why colors red..so that im not dead..

circulates inside as i walk with pride..
cant you see.. im a man..who needs to live forever..

I cry every day..because of me Tetris..


take a philosophy book. by joan a price. youl feel different. explaining the meaning of life. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
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