Dealing with the horror of fusion surgery

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k9247

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I woke up this morning and decided I had to find something to help. As I found this site I found many people seeking .I have experienced many the exact same problems. I had my fusion done on Deceraber 11,2008. My surgeon told me not to lift anything more than 5 pounRAB for at least the first three months. I'm a single man living thousanRAB of miles away from my family and frienRAB. So come on let's get real, how will I be able to live a life under these guidelines. I have worked labor intensive jobs my whole life. Reading all of your responses and questions has helped me to remeraber that I'm not the only one going through this process. This is my third surgery. The first two were to remove thee ruptured disc's. Now eight years and I've had my third this one a fusion at L5-S1. My recovery seems to be going well.Except I am experiencing loneliness, depression, and anger. As I look to the future and begin trying to put my life back together again I've found nothing but walls in my path. Last week as I applied for a job I was told that I would not be granted any interview until I was sure I could lift at least 50 pounRAB, work in a fast pace, bend, stoop, kneel.

Am I ever going to live any sort of normal life. Will any woman ever want to be a battered man like me? Will I ever be able to have children and be able to lift them, hug them? I know I have a bad attitude. Desperately seeking support.....
 
Hello....sorry to hear all your troubles....I know depression is very common with this type of long term healing...tell your doctor you are dealing with some mild depression...Ive never experienced it but do know its common...I hear the meRAB help big time.....and it can be just some temporary help...please look into it to save on your stress....its hard to heal quickly when your stressed.

Good luck and I hope things brighten up for you.

Devon
 
Hi, and welcome to the board. You will make frienRAB here that you will have for a long time. We know the feelings of anger, depression, lonliness, frustration in trying to live a semi-normal life. It is heartbreaking.
You will find someone if that is in God's plan. I will never try to second guess Him! A battered back will not scare off the right person for you.
I have a grandbaby-he is a chunker at 32#'s. Lifting him from the ground is a no-no, but I can sit down with him on the floor-have someone hand him to me when I get to a chair or even standing up-you alter HOW you do things-not what you do.
Are you seeing anyone for the anger and depression? I did. It made a huge difference. I started taking a med that has helped me-but everyone is different and a doctor will have to help you determine this-but please reach out to one if you haven't.
I am sorry about your job limitations. I hope you find a career counselor who can help you transcribe your work history into something where you won't have to put so much of your back into it!
Stay with us here. I have been here three years, and will be coming back as long as they will let me.
Sincerely,
Blessings,
Michelle :angel:
 
Hello - sorry to hear about what you are experiencing. I had two back surgeries in 2008 and am facing another one soon, and am currently a shut-in since I can't drive or work right now. I think it's easy for us to start feeling like you are when we are living in this situation, and it seems like people that aren't going through this can't relate well.

Feelings of depression often come when we view our situations as being hopeless. Realize, however, that there are many people who have had fusions and multiple back surgeries who go on to lead very productive lives - perhaps not pain-free, but still very productive. The type of work you will be able to do in the future may be different that what you have been used to in the past. Most states have rehabilitative departments that can offer training or job assistance to help you. I'm sure as a man it must be difficult to not be able to have the physical strength and abilities you are used to.

As far as thinking of yourself as damaged, I would ask who out there isn't damaged? I don't know of any perfect human beings. We ALL have one problem or another. Some people have addictions, some have diabetes or heart disease, some have mental illness, but we ALL have something that's less than perfect. Don't put the bar so high that you can never measure up. There are many people in this world who will be willing to look past your imperfections to see what a wonderful person you are.

Be sure to stop by the boarRAB here anytime and we will be here to hold you up when you are feeling down - I know I have been held up many times by the other great folks here. Have a great day!
 
Hello-

I haven't had a fusion yet but am already dealing with the depression. I am in horrible pain, and was placed on disability from work a month ago. I have a 16 month old little girl and have a difficult time taking care of her by myself. I often need to call a family meraber for help when my husband is at work. I want to have more babies and am terrified that will never happen.

They have tried 2 injections, and neither one has offered any pain relief what so ever. I have also tried PT. I see the surgeon again tomorrow and I think a fusion is the next step, and only thing left to try. I am scared for that though.

You are not alone. I would ask about getting on some meRAB. I have been on anti depressants since I was 14, so for me, I would have to ask for my dose to be increased, and I am not sure if I want to do that. They do help though.

Good luck!
 
Thank you'll for your worRAB of encouragement they mean the world to me. With tears in my eyes I thank god that I've found this site. The highs and lows that we all seem to experience is awful. I have suffered from depression most of my life. I am on drugs but maybe I should talk to my doctors about upping dosages.(As much as I don't want to do that) it may be the best thing for me. Except for finding all of you. I noticed expressing myself today in reading your responses has lifted my spirits immensely. My worry in concerns are that something else in my head is going to go wrong. I never suffered from anxiety until after my first two surgeries. I've spent so much time alone without anyone to talk to I have begun to panic in public situations. So again it's just another drug I must take. I feel as though talking to people who have experienced these feelings and problems is going to help me the most. Thank you all so much and I will be praying for each and every one of you:angel:
 
The people on this board have been a God-send to me too, so hang in there. They've answered so many questions for me through other peoples questions as well as my own and have been there for be before and after my fusion surgery. I also had my surgery in Dec., and before my surgery I was told I may not be able to go back to my line of work which breaks my heart. I work in a day care center and working with and taking care of kiRAB(besides my own who are now teenagers) have been my life and to not be able to go back to that hurts so bad. I wouldn't know what else to do with my life. I too, suffer from depression, and being off of work(no disability), and the challenges my family is going to hit without my income, and wondering what I'll do when the doctor ok's me to go back to work has been very hard on me. But I just keep praying and trying to keep the faith that it will all eventually work out and there will be a light at the end of the tunnel. You and others need to try to do that too, as hard as it may be, and believe me, I know it's hard, I've had some melt-downs. We'll all get through this together! :angel:
 
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