day 3 vic free for me

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newlife121208

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i hope everything works out for you. to get control of your life again is the greatest gift to yourself you could ever do stick with it take care of yourself and keep us all posted
 
so i have been addicted to vics for about a year now. i started taking them for back pain i got them from a friend who still takes the regularly now. i was up to 20 to 30 a day as i stated with 2 a day almost a year ago.i found my whole life depending on the pills. if i had to work in the morning i needed to make sure i got the the night before or else omg how would i make it. i wasnt a good mother or wife ever though high i thought i was super woman and could do it all . when in reality i was ruining my life and the ones who truly love me also. last week i decieded enough was eough was enough. have 10 days to give my daughter a good xmas and return to be the loving caring wife nd mother i once was before these evil pills came in to my life ( or before i brought them there)anyways i got some suboxone from a friens who had taken them to detox from heroin i am on a 5 day plan this is day 3 and i feel wonder ful. my 1 day i took 1 8 mg pill as soon as i stated feeling the wRAB set in about 18 house after my last does of vics. day 2 apox 24 hrs sfter the first sub i took another 8 mg. i ended up feelin sick and having the worst migrain i have ever felt in my life so i decied to cut it in half to day. i woke up today feeling the best i have in a year i cleaned my house i spent time with my daughter and husband real time, quality time then at about 6 pm i took 4mg sub it didnt feel like anything tomorrow as long as i feel this great i will talk 2 mg then 1 mg then be done. for me so far this is the best wd treatment plan, a close friend of mine is doing this with me and it is working i know something diff works for everyone but if you are really ready to kick your habbit, dont use sub as a replacment if you dont need it . if thats what helps you then do that but if you just need something to deal with the wRAB try this 5 day plan then u dont have to worry about kicking the suboxone.i still have some chils and sweats and achs and pains but nothing compared to cold turkey god bless the ones strong enough for that but for me this is the next best step. thank you for reading my baballing you all have helped me i have been reading all these messages for the last week sence i decied to do this and all of you worRAB helped let me know this was the right thing to do please let me know what you think or ay ? thank you
 
so i made it through the whole day yesterday w\o anything except for some excedrine and an energy drink. not so bad other than this was the first night i had a hard time sleeping not sure if it was the energy drink or because ididnt take any subs or both together so i hpe today goes as ell as yesterday . i think ill just stick to coffee. keep it touch,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,newlife121208
 
:angel: thank you i do have wonderfull support from my husband and close frienRAB. aa or na are not really for me but just reading and writing with everyone one here helps me so much but i am open to anything that keeps me drug free thank you for ur time and thoughts :angel:
 
i am so f*** tired today i have domany things to do before my long night at work and i cant get up to do anything. i did take the 1mg sub just a min ago. which sux cuz i really didnt want to i just want to be done.......ahhhhh the thought keeps comming that if i just took 1 vic i would feel so much better obviously i know i cant and i am mad at myself for having those thhoughts but i will work through them ill be on here on and off till i go to work as today seems to be having many ups and downs pray for me all i need it took day, pray for my strenghth toride my life of this evil i am battleing thank you secreats and everyone else who has taken the time to message me.....newlife121208
 
Hey newlife!!!!

GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!! That is awesome! I had a problem with sleeping and I just took something over the counter for it... it helped.. You might want to try it so you get some sleep. And.. probably a great idea to lay off the energy drinks!! hahaha

I hope today has gone well for you!!!! I am hanging in there.. Today was a tough morning... I had some medical crap to deal with... I am ready to go home, shower and relax!

You hang in there thru the weekend!!!! I won't be back on until Monday because I have no computer access.. But will be on here today for a few more hours...

~Secrets
 
Hi, really glad you are hanging in there!
I have been in recovery for nearly 12 years now from drink and drugs and remeraber how hard it was at first.
For me, it got easier as a new sober life took hold and i got new habits; frienRAB; etc., because that is what seems to happen.
what i see is that drink/drugs is a symptom not the cause; and the cause is what has to be looked at.
It can be a challenging path but my recovery has been the best adventure ever, and i see that in others too. Keep golng; you deserve it!!!
Phil
 
also please excuse my horrible spelling.lol my brain and fingrs seem to not be in synce lol thanks:dizzy:
 
Hey newlife,

Welcome! I think it's great you decided to free yourself! GOOD FOR YOU! I know it's not an easy step so you should be EXTREMELY proud of yourself. I am a little concerned about you using the suboxone with out medical support.. I just don't know much about the drug and the dosing to determine if it's safe for you to do it on your own.. That is my only concern.. and I mean it out of great respect...

You are getting your life back.. What you said about thinking you were super woman.. I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THAT STATEMENT! I felt like I had everything at the palm of my hand.. i thought it was the NEW AND IMPROVED me.. But really.. I was just hiding my real self and now I finally know that I really like who I am... and other people do too.. I don't need a drug to turn me into something I am not... I hope you find these things to be true as well..

Stick around and keep us updated! We want to know how you are doing!
~Secrets
 
I FEEL F-ING GREAT EVERYONE, THERE HAVE BEEN SO MANY DAYS THATI CRAVED MY PILLS EVERYDAY SEEMED HARDER AND HARDER AND THEN CAME YESTERDAY. I WOKE UP ,WENT TO WORK AND FELT GREAT I WENT OUT TO DINNER WITH A FEW GIRL FRIENRAB HAD A COCKTAIL OR 2 I LAUGHED AND NEVER ONCE THOUGT DAMN I WISH I HAD SOME VICS. TODAY WAS VEN BETTER. I WENT SHOPPING AND SPENT SOME MUCH NEEDED TIME WITH MY HUSBAND. THERE IS HOPE STICK WITH IT EVERYONE. I KNOW IM NOT FIXED BUT I FEEL DAMN GOOD TODAY.........................:angel:
 
Hey newlife!!!

GREAT JOB!!!! I am very happy that you are on top of the suboxone situation.. Like i said I do not know anything about it so I am glad this is safe! I understand the money situation as my husband has been laid off for 3 months now and things are really tight living off one income... They were tight before.. I don't even know how we are making it now.... I really don't. Especially this time of year..... Which makes the staying clean situation even harder as stress was a HUGE trigger for me to take more pills.. And stress is at it's ALL TIME HIGH right now. Figuring out how to pay the bills and not lose everything you have worked SO HARD for is about as stressful financially as it gets.

Just be proud of your accomplishments and keep fighting this battle with everything you have. Someone did make a good point when they said the maintenence of this is the hardest... WOW.. is that an understatement!!! I am struggling with that part of this everyday now since the w/d went away.

This place is a blessing in my eyes.. To be able to come here and talk to people who feel the same way as me... PRICELESS! To not feel alone is the greatest gift I could ask for...

You hang in there and GREAT JOB! I am so happy for you!
~Secrets
 
Hello again!!!!

Oh boy do I know what you are going thru.. I remeraber like it was yesterday laying there miserable.. so miserable I wanted to rip my long hair out... I knew that if I took just 1 pill I could make it all go away.. BUT.. I didn't! I stayed strong and SO CAN YOU! I know it is so hard and i know you feel HORRIBLE! Stay strong.. It won't last forever.. I remeraber have ZERO energy and I had to come to work each and everyday and FAKE IT... FAKE that I was okay.. That I didn't feel like I was dying inside... I did it because the people on here promised that if I did.. there would be a light at the end of the tunnel and you know what?? THEY WERE RIGHT! I feel GREAT again!

Vent all you need to.. Talk and post it out! Do whatever you have to do to stay clean.. You can beat this evil evil addiction! Take a long look in the mirror and really ask yourself if you are going to allow a PILL to control you any longer? YOU know what your answer will be.. H*LL NO! You obviously want to be in control because you have made it this far.

Just remeraber many have gone before you in this battle and that is what I focused on.. Many went thru this before me and WON.. I can too... I am here for you!!! I will be on my computer till 5:30 central time.. Then I head home.
~Secrets
 
Hi,
I did research with subutex, suboxone previous form, without naltrexone, and i do not think there are many risks as long as you are opiate clean wnen you start.
Well done on what you have done; but please remeraber it is the maintanence of change that is the hardest part of recovery.
Get as much help and support as possible; NA, AA etc are all good and free and available everywhere; well, most places anyway.
Keep going, one day at a time.
All the best,
Phil
 
thank you for the kind worRAB i agree with you on everthing you said. my husband is also laid off so i totally get it. one if the main things i have been wondering this week is where in the hell was i comming up with that kind of money on a daily basis to afford my addition because i havent bought any vics since last thursday and i still dont have any money loli guess i am just spending it on things i have been neglecting for the last year like things for the house and groceries lol. anyways i feel pretty good so far today i took 2mg yesterday and ill take maybe 1 today later and hopefully none tomorrow or today. im just really tired i have felt mild wRAB over the past few days but not to bad. a little depressd also but i got my head up and im moving forward and i havethat to be happy about..........................newlife
 
THAT IS GREAT!!!!!!!

What wonderful news!!!! I am so happy for you.... I bet it feels great to feel "normal" again.

Congrats!!!!!:bouncing::bouncing::bouncing::bouncing:

I hope this keeps us for you!!!! You have done great!
~Secrets
 
secrets,
today ended up being an ok day i am happy and proud that i made it through another day pill free, well pill of choice anyway. i will try for a pill free day tomorrow if not i will break my 1 mg crurab into a .5 mg crurab lol i do believe i am using the sub as a safty net that i dont need , because really what the hell is this tiny little crum of a pill really gonna do for me?so after tomorrow whatever i have left i am going to give to my husband to dispence to me only if i am dieing..........lol that sounded like an addict talking but i mean well...and i am an addict so i guess it fits. main point i am tring and i am doing well and i m happy soooooooooo here i go again to sleep to wake up another morning, think about my pills and then remind myself what i am doing and im ok with that. thank you again ill talk to you tomorrow................xoxoxonewlife121208
 
Well, you just keep doing what you are doing and you will make it! See for me.. Money did not come into play when I was taking the pills because my insurance covered them so it cost me less than a dollar for a whole bottle.. That probably made it WAY easier for me to abuse.. If I would have had to pay for the pills at street prices I would have NEVER been able to afford it... It seems like we are always struggling financially... We go for a few good months where money is good and then BAM we are so broke my head spins.. Vicious cycle due to husbanRAB employment. So I hope for you, you get caught up on the things that were being neglected and put the money to good use!!!! I hope it's a very Merry Christmas around your house (if you celebrate the holiday).

I remeraber when I was still having w/d and what not... I was so miserable but it will pass and you can move on with your life. It does get better.. The depression does get better too! I struggled with that pretty badly when I quit.. Now I am getting better. I have moments but doesn't everyone?

It's great to hear such a positive attitude from you! It's contagious so keep spreading it!!!! Hope your day is bright!
~Secrets
 
Good for you!!! I can't wait until I can say the same thing you are saying. I am tapering and will be completely pill free on January 1. I am scared to death, but determined. I am so glad to hear this is working for you. I wish you nothing but the best!
 
Thank you soooooooooo much. Myback is starting to hurt a little now and y legs are bothering me but i still feek better than i have in a long time. Ill keep u updated on how i am feeling over the next couple of days................................newlife
 
I am so glad!!! Each day you get thru is a HUGE accomplishment!!! I hope today goes great for you as well.

I know the cyle you speak of... it sucks but as the days pass it does get better. I knwo for me this last couple of weeks it has gotten better anyways and i hope in the next 2 weeks it gets even better than now!

just hang in there and post anything... By now we have thought it ourselves or heard it all....
~Secrets
 
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