hey guys. Well heres the story.
I was pulled out of uni by my gp cuz I had a nervous breakdown. Turns out I have a chemical inbalance. Ive had 3 breakdowns one when I was 5...bit mad :tongue: one when i was 16 and the last I was 18 or 19. Anyhoo I was forever a wreck and nervous and having panic attacks, was at one point claustraphobioc and agraphobic at the same time. That was a fun month hehe.
(I laugh about it cuz it honestly doesnt bother me at all)
Im on my second year out from uni at them mo, and on meds which fix the balance and leave me free to do what I want. Which quite frankly makes me extatic
However I got involved with a holiday company (persausion by my mother) and I am now going to work in England with kids at a camp for 8 months. Dont get me wrong I want to give it a go. Im exited to be going somewhere new and meeting new people, but Im just worried that all the stress will cause my condidtion to come back, although Im on medication, returning to the way I was is not an option, to quote my gp "well your still alive somehow, thats a start!". Ive not been able to relax my whole life, now I finally can, Im not sure how I could handle all that stress thrown at me at once.
So yea, imna be separated form my family, my bf, my friends, my animals, my security for 8 months. My dad thinks Ill fail miserably since I cannot hold down a job. My mum has little faith also, as does the rest of my family. My bf says he doesnt want me to leave but hes supporting my decision 100% as its mine to make, and if I go and give up he wont judge me, just be proud of me for trying.
My mum really wants me to make a go of it. But they all think I will fail. Im not sure how well Ill handle the stress of it all, and If my health deteriorates again, Ill have to give in. However if I fail my parents will just say "i told you so" and I cant have that, its a crushing thing to hear. They will most likley say Im being lazy, as I have been in the past.
I want to go, but Im afraid of the concequences if I cant do it. Id be much happier in going if I knew that if it did get too tough for me I could come home and be told "at least you tried". The point of my break from uni was to let me stabilise, and now I have running headfirst into this is scary.
I could have the time of my life. I wont know till I go tho.
What to do eh? :tongue:
x
I was pulled out of uni by my gp cuz I had a nervous breakdown. Turns out I have a chemical inbalance. Ive had 3 breakdowns one when I was 5...bit mad :tongue: one when i was 16 and the last I was 18 or 19. Anyhoo I was forever a wreck and nervous and having panic attacks, was at one point claustraphobioc and agraphobic at the same time. That was a fun month hehe.
(I laugh about it cuz it honestly doesnt bother me at all)
Im on my second year out from uni at them mo, and on meds which fix the balance and leave me free to do what I want. Which quite frankly makes me extatic
However I got involved with a holiday company (persausion by my mother) and I am now going to work in England with kids at a camp for 8 months. Dont get me wrong I want to give it a go. Im exited to be going somewhere new and meeting new people, but Im just worried that all the stress will cause my condidtion to come back, although Im on medication, returning to the way I was is not an option, to quote my gp "well your still alive somehow, thats a start!". Ive not been able to relax my whole life, now I finally can, Im not sure how I could handle all that stress thrown at me at once.
So yea, imna be separated form my family, my bf, my friends, my animals, my security for 8 months. My dad thinks Ill fail miserably since I cannot hold down a job. My mum has little faith also, as does the rest of my family. My bf says he doesnt want me to leave but hes supporting my decision 100% as its mine to make, and if I go and give up he wont judge me, just be proud of me for trying.
My mum really wants me to make a go of it. But they all think I will fail. Im not sure how well Ill handle the stress of it all, and If my health deteriorates again, Ill have to give in. However if I fail my parents will just say "i told you so" and I cant have that, its a crushing thing to hear. They will most likley say Im being lazy, as I have been in the past.
I want to go, but Im afraid of the concequences if I cant do it. Id be much happier in going if I knew that if it did get too tough for me I could come home and be told "at least you tried". The point of my break from uni was to let me stabilise, and now I have running headfirst into this is scary.
I could have the time of my life. I wont know till I go tho.
What to do eh? :tongue:
x