Can someone help me understand the "flash forwards" and stuff in Lost?

Okay NO SPOILERS please! I just finished episode 2 of season 5 (yes, I'm slow) and I'm really really confused. So the "flash forwards" with them leaving, is that supposed to be present time or something? Or are they showing what would happen if they decide to leave the island? I've been following the episodes while reading wikipedia articles to try and answer my questions. Like the scenes with Kate and Aaron is that supposed to be present time while like Sawyer and Juliet and everyone are on the island time traveling? I'm really confused..I can't separate what's a flash forward and what's in the present time with the Oceanic Six. Or did 3 years really pass? I only left off on season 5 episode 2 (The Lie) so don't give away anything after that.

I pretty much got lost after the end of season 4 where Ben moved the island and the Oceanic Six got onto the boat and Desmond and Penny reunited.
 
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