She is very friendly, very out going, always has something to say and engages anyone and everyone in conversation. But there has been a few occasions where she has been quite rude, even a bully to me. In contrast I am the youngest in my family (20) and I am much more introverted (but I wouldn't harm a fly). She does not seem to have done these things to any of my other family members n the time I have known her (a year) but perhaps she senses the dynamics in my family (that the youngest is somewhat dismissed, ignored, not as valued as the other members and so has adapted in accordance)...There have been times I have offered my help in certain situations. I am pretty quiet when my family are speaking and don't interrupt or dominate a group. Perhaps it looks weak socially or something but when I interjected kindly to help out she started laughing and then said "You just stay quiet" then she caught my hands like it was affectionate but immediately threw them at me aggressively. I couldn't say "Don't do that to me again or I will rip your head off" (though I was thinking it) because my whole family have their own biases and prejudices and no one would in fact defend me (Any time a person has done me wrong in the past they show clear favouritism on the part of the other person. It is just the way it is)..Anyway there have been other times myself, my mom and my sis in law are in the kitchen and we are discussing something and I say something she cuts across me halting with her hand cutting me off effectively and engaging my mother. Again in my family the dynamics are such that were I to say "Don't do that to me" I would be the rude person, not her. I have a college degree, I am well read, I am not an idiot who has nothing to say for herself. I don't really know what to think about this woman? It confuses me because she is nice a great deal of the time but sometimes she can be such a loser. When I first met her she very perplexingly told me about all the men she dated when she went to college "alot, alot" (she is 35) almost as though she was boasting or something (I have had alot of men interested in me too and I don't make a thing about it)? What the hell is this ridiculous behaviour about? She would ask me why I am so self conscious (I am not more so then anyone else. I am just quiet).. She seems to think at least regarding other quiet people I have heard her speak about there is something wrong with that.. She is only like this with me and not my other family members. But I always get a sense that I am dismissed in her presence and I have so much more self respect then that. I am a college graduate 1.1. I am disappointed in her because am I right in saying her behaviour is petty, small minded?
She has been quite nasty to me in these ways and I try to avoid her now because there is no way I am being close to someone on these terms for their ego boost.
Anyway please give me your thoughts.
This is also why I have quite a distrust of louder gregarious people as their friendliness nearly always turns out to be so fickle, shallow. It is a paradox undoubtedly but the quieter humbler people who take longer to get to know have always invariably turned out to be just better people on the whole even though they may seem aloof at first.
She has been quite nasty to me in these ways and I try to avoid her now because there is no way I am being close to someone on these terms for their ego boost.
Anyway please give me your thoughts.
This is also why I have quite a distrust of louder gregarious people as their friendliness nearly always turns out to be so fickle, shallow. It is a paradox undoubtedly but the quieter humbler people who take longer to get to know have always invariably turned out to be just better people on the whole even though they may seem aloof at first.