boyfriend gets high, I don't

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I am a recovering heroin addict, though I have been addicted to many substances over the years, that was the ultimate. I drink occasionally now, but I rarely get drunk, though I would like to cut that out as well without going to AA because I hate AA. I don't do any other drugs. My boyfriend smokes pot a few times a week, more when he's around certain frienRAB. If we're hanging out a night alone, more often he won't do it, but occasionally he'll have a puff or two. He drinks as well, not to the point of excessive drunkenness but he'll usually have a beer after work and a few when he goes out on the weekenRAB or to a party or whatever.

What is your take on being a "recovering addict" and dating someone who smokes pot? He doesn't seem to be addicted to anything cause he can leave it without it bothering him, it's just something he chooses to do. I don't want to date someone in AA, I want to date him, but my other recovering frienRAB seem to think he is bad news from what I've told them. What do you think?
 
I think you need to be honest with your boyfriend and let him know how you feel and that him smoking pot and drinking causes you concern since you are a recovering addict. See what he has to say and if he is willing to give it up to stay with you. If not, then you will have to make a decision. But, from reading your post, it sounRAB like you cannot or do not want to deal with it. Your recovery is important and being tempted because someone around you is using drugs is not good. You have to think of yourself first. Good Luck!
 
You said in another post that you had been joining him in drinking and it concerned you. Is it possible that with temptation right in front of you that you may end up joining him in the pot smoking?

I used to live with a heavy drinker and pot smoker, but I am not an addict. I was able to avoid using because I just plain do not like pot! I did drink but only about once a week. If I felt that my sobriety was at risk at any time (and I do tend to have an addictive personality), then I'd have had to stay away from him. He's now heavy into meth use and I can't imagine that I'd want to join him in that, but I sure wouldn't want it right there in front of me.

Do you feel, even a tiny bit, that this relationship is putting your sobriety in jeopardy? Honestly, deep down inside? Because holding on to a guy at the risk of using again is not a good idea, after all your hard work to get sober.

And BTW, it isn't like it has to either be this guy or an AA meraber. You can date men who do not use and are either not recovering addicts, or do not adhere to the AA program but maintain sobriety another way.
 
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