Books & Authors Is Quite Boring Right Now, So...?

[.Nicoleee]

Why don't you read and critique my vampire 'books' fourth chapter I just wrote it, so there will be some mistakes so let me know when if you see any:
http://www.worthyofpublishing.com/chapter.asp?chapter_ID=13961

Also, comment if you have an account please and if you have a better chapter name, I would appreciate it. I would recommend reading the other chapters first but if you can't be stuffed, don't worry.
One;
http://www.worthyofpublishing.com/chapter.asp?chapter_ID=12112
Two;
http://www.worthyofpublishing.com/chapter.asp?chapter_ID=13717
Three;
http://www.worthyofpublishing.com/chapter.asp?chapter_ID=13754

Tell me if you see any mistakes, in any of them

Thanks in advance <3
It isn't boring all the time, just now Faye. And everybody promotes there work on Yahoo answers, plus it's a better way to get feedback instead of just people saying on the site 'Great Job!!'
Spike, don't judge it just because it's about vampires. I think you will be pleasantly surprised and later on in the 'book' there's a twist on them.
Cracker, then why did you answer?

 

[Spike]

i saw the word vampire and thought 'NOPE' but you are right that this section is becoming pretty boring.