Black biracial raised exclusively white environment - I'm a little desperate.?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Moksha
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Moksha

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I'm having some issues. I grew up in NYC, moved to RI, met the love of my life who's from overseas living here 20 years. She has a black child she's adopted - real sweetheart. We've been going together for a few months, but I seem to be having something resembling triggers of the negative effects of being raised by whites myself. She's a fantastic mom, as is her ex, and I haven't had any complaints. But living here in RI, where we keep finding ourselves still surrounded by white people is having a bad effect on me even though I basically keep it in check. Legally the kid is hers, the child is happy healthy loves her parents, but it does bother me to the kid surrounded by nothing but white kids in her class, and I can't help but feel like all the liberalness is just lip service because if there was any effort toward diversity, it would be visible!

I need to find healthy loving ways to diffuse. If you're going to comment with stupid remarks, or lame p c comments, please keep them to yourself. It's a lonely feeling for me being surrounded by so many white people just as when I was young. I keep thinking to myself, "Yeah the baby is cute now, but what happens when she becomes someone to reckon with?" She'll be surrounded by people making ignorant comments who defensively say: " No I'm not racist! I voted for Obama; and my grandparents marched with Martin Luther King!"

Any CONSTRUCTIVE advice is welcomed. This is a wonderful woman, and I do love her, but my knee jerking is becoming difficult. I'm still getting acclimated here and we're only ever around her community who is dominantly white. HELP!
 
You do have a dilema! Because you are in a liberal state and not amongst the rednecks of the south, there may still be hope for you and your family. However, I would still suggest moving to a more diverse community, BEFORE your girlfriend's child grows up. As "liberal" as those so-called "white" people may act in RI, the are still the same. Meaning they still have the same sense of entitlement as all the others, and won't hesitate to lash out at anything or anyone who they see as different or a threat to the perfect little "white" world they perceive. You have two choices...move to a more diverse community or deal with the hidden racism to come. Good luck to you.
 
Maybe you should move? I'm a white person myself and grew up in an uppity suburb with mostly whites and the token black family and gay couple living at the end of the street. It's hell isn't it? Seriously i hated every minute of it. Everyone was the same.

My advice? get out of dodge. It's important for everyone to feel connected to their communities and to be around like minded people.
 
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