oh my fucking lord
you need a tall, frosty glass of SHUT THE HELL UP.
honestly, how can any of us offer you sympathy or advice with the way you approach things? your life revolves around you and your obsession with your exgf.
it's not even sane; you're obsessed.. but you're obsessed about your own obsession. it's like "ME ME ME ME ME AND MY OBSESSION OVER MY EX."
she's out of your life. you claim to be rich and refined and blah blah blah, but you're choosing to present yourself to us as a fucking hoser. it's not necessarily WHO you are, but it's WHO you are showing us. and i'll tell you, if you're showing that to the rest of the world, it's gonna be even less attractive in real life.
chill.