Warning, long rant below
But right now, I'd give my left cajone to be loading up my truck with an assload of boxes, giving myself a hernia as I'm attempting to lift shit that's way too heavy, which is what I thought I'd be doing this weekend. In order not too make this too lengthy, here's how it all went down.
April 1st (I really should have seen the irony): I get "Congratulations, your pre-approved" email from US Bank, pretty much telling me I'm good to go (looking for a house) after reviewing our credit report.
April 21st: We find a home we absolutely love, put $1000 earnest money down, and make offer 20k below asking price.
April 22nd: Sellers accept offer, closing date is set for May 21st. Fucking perfect, we get the long holiday weekend to move.
April 23rd through May 14th: Start packing everything up, and sign/submit assloads of paperwork for the loan.
May 14th: US Bank contact calls. "Mr kid65, I've got good news, and bad news"
"Ummmm....OK, give me the bad news first"
"The underwriter rejected your loan"
"WTF (site plug), we're 1 week away from closing. You informed me I was approved for this loan, what happened?"
"I'm not sure, Mr. kid65, I havent been informed of the reason"
"OK, what's the good news?"
"I know a very good mortgage broker, who should have no problem getting you a loan, here's his #"
Wifey is heartbroken, and I'm just pissed. So I contact the aforementioned broker, and he goes down to US Bank (fuckers) to grab all my paperwork the next day.
Meanwhile, I fire off an email to US Bank dude, basically calling him, and the bank a bunch of incompetent fucksticks. And I demand some type of explanation as to how were were allowed to get so far along in the process, and then have our loan denied. I'm still awaiting a response....fuckers.
Broker calls me back after reviewing my paperwork from US Bank, and says he should have no trouble getting me the loan. And maybe.. just maybe..we can still get it all done by the original 21st closing date.
What a fucking pipe dream that was.
Rinse/wash/repeat the same process we did with US Bank (fuckers) with all the paperwork and shit.
May 20th, call from broker: "Mr kid65, we've got a problem"
:banghead: "Errr...what's the problem?"
"The underwriter doesnt like your wifes credit rating, we're going to have to remover her from the loan, and put it soley in your name"
Ya..ya'll can imagine how well that went over with the wifey....but anyhoo, I meet the broker next day, and re-fucking-sign all the crap that I've signed twice already to this point, only everything is without my wifes name on it.
The 21st comes and goes, and of course, there's no way that everything can get done that quickly. So we have to ask the sellers for an extension. Broker tells me, we defo should be able to get this done by June 1st.
Extension filed with sellers, and accepted. No problem. June 1st it is!!
OK, thats not too bad...and besides, we need to buy a bunch of shit for our new home, and there's some great sales on Memorial day Weekend.
We go drop $5k on a new TV, dining room set, loveseat, and refrigerator. Schedule everything to be delivered on June 3rd, 2 days after we were to close.
May 22nd through 28th: Continue to pack up all our shit, staying in constant contact with broker, making sure everything is going smoothly. Am informed everything is in underwriting, and all looks good. Call on the 28th, to confirm that we can still sign on the 1st, and am told it looks "doubtful", as he hasnt heard back from the underwriters, but it for sure should be Tuesday the 2nd, at the latest.
"Ummm..I really need to lock this down, because now I've got to call the furniture place and reschedule delivery, I also need to get my address changed, and deal with the utility folks, and the cable company, and the satellite company...what should I tell them?"
"We should sign on Tues, at the latest Mr kid65, and the loan should fund on Wed, so Thurs should be good for getting all that done."
So, I reschedule delivery for Thurs.
Monday the 1st comes and goes, no calls from broker confirming a closing time for Tues. I call, and am told it's still in underwriting, perhaps we'll close on Wed.
Da'Kidmiester blows his stack, I forget what I said, but I know the term "I'm tired of getting jacked around" came out.
Tues comes and goes...hear nothing from broker :banghead:
Finally, Wed morning, I get call. "Mr. kid65, we can close Thurs am, and the loan will fund on Friday afternoon, so you'll be able to move this weekend"
"HALLE-FUCKING-LUJA!!!"
I call furniture place, and re-schedule everything to be delivered on Saturday.
Sign my life away Thursday am.
Friday, make all the calls to utility companies, and set appts for Monday to meet the cable and satellite guys for install. Hire a moving company for my extremely heavy shit, that I just don't want to deal with trying to move for Monday also.
Wifey kid, and I are happy as clams, as we're finally going to get to move into our new home!!!!
Call from Realtor Friday afternoon. "Mr kid65, sorry, got some bad news...the loan didnt fund today"
"You gotta be fucking kidding me"
"No, I wish I was. Apparently the lender is extremely backed up right now, with a lot of refinancing (interest rates are kick-asss right now, so a lot of folks are doing this), and they didnt have time to fund your loan.
Can I catch just one..only one fucking break in this whole process? :banghead:
Fuck, so now I've got to call the furniture place a-fucking-gain, and reschedule, as we cant move this weekend. Only this time, I get charged 50 bones because they already had my shit on the truck for Sat, and will have to unload it. Motherfuckers. I told them Tuesday...but now I'm thinking Wed might be safer.
Today I get to call the cable and satellite and moving folks too, but I'm so fucking gun shy right now, I dont know what date to give them. Is this shit gonna get done Monday? I dont fucking know.
All I know is this whole fucking process has been a drag, and extremely frustrating. Totally taking all the joy out of buying a new home. And now, I've got to use my vacation time to take days off from work next week to move (hopefully).
Long rant complete, thank you for your time.
:thumbsup: