Okay so I'm asking this question here in this forum (rather than in singles and dating or in lgbt) because I want advice/suggestion from someone who is married or in a relationship.
Okay there's a bit of back story but to make it short ... I have had a female friend for about a year now, who up until a month or so ago, was one of my closest friends. She hung out with me and my boyfriend all the time. He and I have been together for a few years and have always a great relationship. It's also always been very honest.
About a month ago, I think it was a month ago now, she began coming on to me. At first I shrugged it off because it was always when we were out clubbing and women often engage in 'safe flirting' with their gay male friends. There were two incidents, though (one she surprised me by jumping in the shower with me and coming on to me and then by coming on to me while I was passed out) that really made me see I could not remain her friend because she had issues with boundaries.
I broke off the friendship but on my boyfriend's advice I went to see her to tell her in person why I could not be her friend. She came on to me, and I realized it was due to a simple latent sexual curiosity, and I caved in and hooked up with her. I felt awful about cheating and confided in my partner, who said he needed some space to figure out his feelings. I gave that to him. He has since said he wants to work things out, which makes me happy and I feel like now that that I've 'experimented' I don't really need to again (I think it's odd I never had a conscious desire to experiment with women before but, whatever). As far as my former friend goes, she said she didn't care the friendship was over she got what she wanted (which is messed up after one year of friendship, in my opinion but whatever there too).
Now there's the issue of this charity function. I got her involved in it with me months ago before she ever showed any signs of wanting more than friendship from me. Now there's this event that she and I are scheduled to volunteer for. I tried getting out of it by having another friend take my place because it's out of town and I didn't want to place any further doubts in my boyfriend's mind. I even texted to see if she was going or wanted to get out of it, and she says she's still going. My boyfriend thinks I should go, because it is a charity for children and I did commit my time to helping out. He suggested I simply try to book my room away from hers by booking both rooms and asking for them to be far apart. I guess as long as he is okay with me going I don't have a problem going, but my question is this: do you think she really meant it when she said she didn't care the friendship was over because she got sex from me? I made it very clear after we did the deed that it was not something I wanted to do again. If she is okay keeping her distance then all should be good. I just want to make this trip go as smoothly as possible for everyone involved.
Advice?
Okay there's a bit of back story but to make it short ... I have had a female friend for about a year now, who up until a month or so ago, was one of my closest friends. She hung out with me and my boyfriend all the time. He and I have been together for a few years and have always a great relationship. It's also always been very honest.
About a month ago, I think it was a month ago now, she began coming on to me. At first I shrugged it off because it was always when we were out clubbing and women often engage in 'safe flirting' with their gay male friends. There were two incidents, though (one she surprised me by jumping in the shower with me and coming on to me and then by coming on to me while I was passed out) that really made me see I could not remain her friend because she had issues with boundaries.
I broke off the friendship but on my boyfriend's advice I went to see her to tell her in person why I could not be her friend. She came on to me, and I realized it was due to a simple latent sexual curiosity, and I caved in and hooked up with her. I felt awful about cheating and confided in my partner, who said he needed some space to figure out his feelings. I gave that to him. He has since said he wants to work things out, which makes me happy and I feel like now that that I've 'experimented' I don't really need to again (I think it's odd I never had a conscious desire to experiment with women before but, whatever). As far as my former friend goes, she said she didn't care the friendship was over she got what she wanted (which is messed up after one year of friendship, in my opinion but whatever there too).
Now there's the issue of this charity function. I got her involved in it with me months ago before she ever showed any signs of wanting more than friendship from me. Now there's this event that she and I are scheduled to volunteer for. I tried getting out of it by having another friend take my place because it's out of town and I didn't want to place any further doubts in my boyfriend's mind. I even texted to see if she was going or wanted to get out of it, and she says she's still going. My boyfriend thinks I should go, because it is a charity for children and I did commit my time to helping out. He suggested I simply try to book my room away from hers by booking both rooms and asking for them to be far apart. I guess as long as he is okay with me going I don't have a problem going, but my question is this: do you think she really meant it when she said she didn't care the friendship was over because she got sex from me? I made it very clear after we did the deed that it was not something I wanted to do again. If she is okay keeping her distance then all should be good. I just want to make this trip go as smoothly as possible for everyone involved.
Advice?