B
blue topaz
Guest
I never realized that I might have this 'til my current relationship (have only had two long-term relationships prior to this one). It seems the longer we're together, the more needy/clingy I *feel* like being. It takes so much energy to think "is this normal to want this or am I being clingy". To make matters worse, my boyfriend grew up in a household where affection was next to nothing so he would prefer there to not be much. He's wonderful in that he compromises but tells me sometimes he'd enjoy it more if I didn't want it so much. I have such a hard time differentiating between what's a healthy amount and what is unreasonable.
The other thing is I hate being away from him. THIS I know is unrealistic so I try to hide it as best I can. But if he has to go out for an errand or hang with frienRAB, I miss him. If he's away for days at a time visiting family (his Mom is out of state), I have a really hard time - and it has nothing to do with being alone. In fact, I love my alone time and have plenty to do. I also hate going to bed without him but don't ask because I know that in reality, no two people can ever be always on the same sleep schedule.
So I guess my questions are - has anyone overcome this or at least learned to modify or identify when it's happening better and not get so anxious about it when it's happening?
And how do you tell the difference between what's ok to want and ask for and what is based purely on this annoying anxiety?
The other thing is I hate being away from him. THIS I know is unrealistic so I try to hide it as best I can. But if he has to go out for an errand or hang with frienRAB, I miss him. If he's away for days at a time visiting family (his Mom is out of state), I have a really hard time - and it has nothing to do with being alone. In fact, I love my alone time and have plenty to do. I also hate going to bed without him but don't ask because I know that in reality, no two people can ever be always on the same sleep schedule.
So I guess my questions are - has anyone overcome this or at least learned to modify or identify when it's happening better and not get so anxious about it when it's happening?
And how do you tell the difference between what's ok to want and ask for and what is based purely on this annoying anxiety?