Yesterday evening, I ran over my cat. I had Ellie Mae for just about 2 years. I have cried and cried since then. I have not been able to get the image of her dying out of my head. She went through my senior year and my first year of college with me. I was very close to her, and she meant a lot to me. I guess my question is, how do I deal with this grief and guilt? I feel like she trusted me.. And I broke that trust by killing her.
Yesterday evening, I ran over my cat..?
- Thread starter MissBC
- Start date
J
jsboo931=
Guest
I know exactly how you feel. I rescued this cat about a month or 2 ago and It just loved me so much. I would pull in the driveway and the cat would move real slow to get out of the way. It knew it was me coming home and run to the car to greet me. It trusted me also and I feel like I broke that trust..I was leaving the house for work and had the car started about 30 secs and put it in reverse and felt a lil bump.(in my head I was thinkin I know that couldnt be the cat) I looked in fron of my car and the cat was coughing up blood and my heart sank to the bottom of my stomache! I couldnt turn away because I didnt know If it was goin to die, I was still comprehending it was coughing up blood ..then it convulses all over the driveway and was bouncing way in the air and landing on its side over and over again until It landed and never got up. I cryed ALL day and at work also. I CANT get the image out of my head and the feeling of pure guilt! I loved that cat and I think about it all the time...This just happened 2 days ago and Im just praying that this feeling goes away and I can feel better. I am a huge animal lover and cant believe I didnt look under the car ..i keep thinking to myself What If I just looked or seen her>? Ugh I completly understand and sorry I wrote so much but it feels so good to get it off my chest, no one but one lady I work with feels this way about animals and cant sympthosize with me!
T
Tufgurl26
Guest
It's like you both replayed my experience, word for word. Yesterday, I was going out to get groceries, and pushed my kitty out the door to go outside. I did the same thing, put my car in reverse and heard a bump. I couldn't believe that I ran over my sweet wonderful kitty. He was about 2 years old, and I rescued him too about 3 months ago around my birthday. He always stayed very close to home, and didn't move fast when cars were pulling out of the driveway. It was probably the most horrifying thing I've ever seen, and I'm still trying to get that image of him convulsing and blood spraying everywhere. I keep seeing his face contorted in pain, and it breaks my heart. I'm so sorry for anybody that has to go through this...it's so painful and horrifying! At least I know I'm not the only one this has happened to... We're all great lovers of animals, and we have to know that those cats were loved very dearly, and that they had wonderful lives. 
T
Tufgurl26
Guest
It's like you both replayed my experience, word for word. Yesterday, I was going out to get groceries, and pushed my kitty out the door to go outside. I did the same thing, put my car in reverse and heard a bump. I couldn't believe that I ran over my sweet wonderful kitty. He was about 2 years old, and I rescued him too about 3 months ago around my birthday. He always stayed very close to home, and didn't move fast when cars were pulling out of the driveway. It was probably the most horrifying thing I've ever seen, and I'm still trying to get that image of him convulsing and blood spraying everywhere. I keep seeing his face contorted in pain, and it breaks my heart. I'm so sorry for anybody that has to go through this...it's so painful and horrifying! At least I know I'm not the only one this has happened to... We're all great lovers of animals, and we have to know that those cats were loved very dearly, and that they had wonderful lives.
T
TombattheThomas Cat
Guest
Feel your pain
I ran over my own cat in May. My husband and I were leaving for a belated honeymoon. Our beloved adopted kitty, Thomas, had been following us around all day - he'd even been sleeping in my car. I had lost another cat 8 months earlier, and the irony was that I had just realized that week Thomas had been helping me get over the loss of the other. He proved his amazing-ness every day after bringing him home from the shelter as a sociable, funny two-year old cat.
But that day, it was as though he knew we were going to leave him. Before making one last errand, I looked out at my car and saw him sleeping under it, and he looked up at me that moment. Despite the fact I saw him, I got distracted and ran to get an item from my room, came back, and started the car and put it in reverse, excited to be on vacation.
The dreaded bump that happened a split second later immediately baffled me. "What was that?!?!" Now, it is burned in my memory as the most awful sensation I've had in my life. Then I saw him run out from under the car - his back sunken. He managed to leap a 6 foot fence into our backyard. I ran inside through the house, out to the back to find him on the side of the house, gasping and convulsing. I scooped him up, and tore through the house back to my car - in a complete state of chaotic angst. I got back in the driver seat, with him convulsing in my lap. In ten seconds, he went limp. I began to howl in my car. Trying to dial my husband on a touch screen phone was a nightmare... my stuttering fingers wouldn't let me dial.
I am comforted to know that you are all out there, sharing in the grief and guilt of this horrible event. The only thing that brings me comfort is a belief in the fact that he may be still out in the spirit-sphere, and a hope that he knows I am sorry and would reverse it if I could. I truly hope to see him again - rainbow bridge or wherever he went in that split second.
I ran over my own cat in May. My husband and I were leaving for a belated honeymoon. Our beloved adopted kitty, Thomas, had been following us around all day - he'd even been sleeping in my car. I had lost another cat 8 months earlier, and the irony was that I had just realized that week Thomas had been helping me get over the loss of the other. He proved his amazing-ness every day after bringing him home from the shelter as a sociable, funny two-year old cat.
But that day, it was as though he knew we were going to leave him. Before making one last errand, I looked out at my car and saw him sleeping under it, and he looked up at me that moment. Despite the fact I saw him, I got distracted and ran to get an item from my room, came back, and started the car and put it in reverse, excited to be on vacation.
The dreaded bump that happened a split second later immediately baffled me. "What was that?!?!" Now, it is burned in my memory as the most awful sensation I've had in my life. Then I saw him run out from under the car - his back sunken. He managed to leap a 6 foot fence into our backyard. I ran inside through the house, out to the back to find him on the side of the house, gasping and convulsing. I scooped him up, and tore through the house back to my car - in a complete state of chaotic angst. I got back in the driver seat, with him convulsing in my lap. In ten seconds, he went limp. I began to howl in my car. Trying to dial my husband on a touch screen phone was a nightmare... my stuttering fingers wouldn't let me dial.
I am comforted to know that you are all out there, sharing in the grief and guilt of this horrible event. The only thing that brings me comfort is a belief in the fact that he may be still out in the spirit-sphere, and a hope that he knows I am sorry and would reverse it if I could. I truly hope to see him again - rainbow bridge or wherever he went in that split second.