yeah another poem lol?

J

J-SeXstasy

New member
It has no title? I just call it "Metophorically Speaking". Yeah C.C welcome, bashings can leave thanks =]


The ice breaks the limbs,
Off of the already rotten tree,
It crumbles into the wind,
Becoming non existing.

It's lonley and hollow,
Been battered around,
Rains dried up leaves,
That disinigrate before they hit the ground.

The tree has nothing more to offer,
No life to even give,
It reminds me of me,
Once had a reason to live.

Left for dead un attended,
Broken promises of everlasting water,
Died before it even had time to grow,
Just another creation to be un bothered.

Ignore it because it looks so sad,
Hardly anything there but a few remains,
Occasionally you'll look at it,
And you say "Damn how can one misfortune cause so much pain?"
thanks alley cat. lol yeah i suck at grammer and punctuation lol. I like your idea too.

Thanks a lot everybody!

I was in a bad space so i felt like a tree lol
Beautiful Garbage is actually the album name of my fav band "Garbage" lol
 
dont know what you could call it but this is so amazing. you should get it in a book or something!
:)
 
Ok, clearing up your grammar real quick. It's lonely and unattended. Sorry! I'm a spelling freak.

I think that it would be a really well- written poem if you made a kind of rhythm within the poem. Say for instance that the first line had six syllables, and the next had five. You could switch them back and forth like that to create rhythm. It might go a little smoother.
 
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