yay for even more negative poems, i tryed writing a positive one but i ended

A

Andy

New member
up writing 2 negative ones? ok then, some of u may have read my previous poems and told me to write a positive one, i cant so i wrote 2 negative ones instead. once again plz leave comments and suggestions

poem #1
I would say I love you,
But I would be lying through me teeth,
And actually how I deep down feel,
Is that I'm dying underneath,

I would say I care for you,
But i really shouldn't lie,
self doubt thoughts swamp my mind,
As I wait for my time to die.

I would say I give a damn,
but again its nothing but lies,
and no matter how much you can't believe it
everyone eventually dies

and here is poem #2

Every single god damn moment
I feel like i want to cry
and Every single god damn moment
I'm sure that i know why.

because Every single god damn moment,
I see you standing there
and Every single god damn moment
I know that you dont care

so Every single god damn moment,
when I'm still dying inside
Every single god damn moment
i really need to confide
 
Negative or not, I like them ... well, at least most of them. I think you have trouble ending your poems - you run out of steam. The second one is great up to the last line.
 
Back
Top