Would you be okay if your spouse was discussing sex on the internet?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Just me
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Just me

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I started visiting a popular blog site. I was asked to guest blog. I really want to write... my hearts desire!! The site deals with urban issues and sex topics (abortion, sexual fantasies, tips and advice). I began writing without telling my husband. I made it clear to everyone that I was married and their was never any sexual advances made towards me or by me. My husband found out and he refuses to compromise with me. I invited him to participate more and he was more than welcome to start seeing everything I wrote or commented on. (Mind you-he was into internet porn @ one point in our marriage) He told me that I have to stay off the internet COMPLETELY! He checks my e-mails and checks my twitter account. I finally deleted it. Our marriage is far from perfect in fact I am pretty miserable. Is it fair of him to take away the internet completely. It has been a hellish relationship. He was/is an alcoholic. He left me for 2 months to live with another woman. He abuses me mentally, emotionally, and has sexually and physically abused me at points in our relationship. We have been together for 15 years. I am considering leaving him in order to have my freedom. What would you do?
 
Why didn't you tell him? It sounds suspicious in all honesty. Is there more to the story? Or did you just not mention it because you knew he wouldn't be okay with it?

Whatever was the case I think he has a right to feel the way he does. Wouldn't you feel odd if your husband had been writing a sex blog for quite sometime and telling you about it just slipped his mind? He probably thinks there is a reason you didn't tell him, i.e. cheating, or some kind of internet chat with other guys.

At the same time though he needs to stop checking your email. Why don't you just change the password? I would offer to let him see my email if he wanted to ease his fears, but after awhile he should get over it. He can't make you get off the internet, draw the line.

Also, what he has done at one point in your marriage doesn't have anything to do with this unless he is doing it now. It's over and done with. (plus it sounds like it was back when he was an alcoholic. ) If he does it again I would leave him. I think though if you loved each other enough and were strong enough to get through that it would be a shame to break up over something as small as this. Too many people are too quick to divorce these days. Why don't you try marriage counseling if you feel you need something more?
 
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